Podcast

TBTL - Too Beautiful To Live

TBTL (Too Beautiful to Live, if you were curious) is a daily weekday podcast from Luke Burbank and co-host/producer Andrew Walsh. It is about life. It is about current events. It is about popular culture. It is about Luke’s weight on that day. Luke, who also hosts the popular Live Wire variety show, started TBTL as a radio program in 2008 before transitioning to the world of podcasts in 2009. Luke, Andrew, and their loyal fans have been going strong ever since.

Episodes

  • #3745 The *Idea* Of A Toilet

    Aug 09 2022

    Luke goes full Rear Window as he watches dog poop drama unfold in the neighborhood outside his window. Plus, a cringy TikTok video/SNL audition tape draws the ire of the internet, which confuses Andrew, since everything is cringy to him. 

  • #3744 Manic Pixie Dream Zombie

    Aug 08 2022

    Tens of Listeners step-up to help Luke and Andrew remember some details of TBTL’s past. Plus, a French scientist sent out a funny tweet and now he’s forced to pretend he did it for some educational purpose.

  • #3743 TBTL Unexplained

    Aug 05 2022

    You’ve got questions, we have…answers? Sort of? Luke and Andrew go through letters from listeners who want to know the origins of jokes, audio drops, and other references regularly heard on TBTL

  • #3742 God Don’t Make No Junk Bonds

    Aug 04 2022

    Andrew has been eating a lot of bologna lately, and no matter how hard he tries to avoid the topic, Luke insists on hearing the details. Luke also recalls the day he broke out of his own bedroom and got his socks all wet.

  • #3741 Macho Macho Dad

    Aug 03 2022

    Luke reveals more details about his childhood dresser, which contained illicit football stickers and the rough-hewn lyrics of an ‘80’s banger. He and Andrew also pay respects to Vin Scully and revel in the latest word salad from the Detroit Lions’ head coach.

  • #3740 Dill With It

    Aug 02 2022

    Pickle flavoring is really having a moment, but pickle-loving Luke isn’t into it. He and Andrew also discuss the best and worst tools on a Swiss Army Knife.

  • #3739 Shut The #%&! Up Elmo

    Aug 01 2022

    TBTL Friendo and Fancy Hollywood Director Cat Solen hops on the show to explain why Muppets and puppets never break character on set. Plus, a big weekend project leaves Andrew more dim-witted than usual on a Monday. And Luke tries to figure out the difference between wingdings and webdings.

  • #3738 I Approve This Massage

    Jul 29 2022

    Luke immediately regrets his decision to sit in a massage chair in the middle of the Bismarck airport, although he did make a new friend while being publicly gyrated. Plus, a chain of chicken restaurants bought $100,000 worth of Mega Millions lottery tickets and intends to share the potential winnings with its employees.

  • #3737 And You Don’t Believe In A Mark?

    Jul 28 2022

    Luke has a moral conundrum regarding his rental car in Bismarck, ND, and he reluctantly asks Andrew for advice. Plus, people in France are freaking out over a mustard shortage. And something peculiar has caught Luke’s eye in a video of Julia Louis-Dreyfus on the set of Sesame Street.

  • #3736 Will It Dunc?

    Jul 27 2022

    Luke joins the show from the Olive Garden District of Bismarck, ND, where he’s been unironically enjoying the bottomless breadsticks and salad. Plus, Andrew has a few things he needs to clear up about yesterday’s “What’s In The Box” segment. Meanwhile, the nation is in mourning over the death of the Choco Taco.

  • #3735 Big Beautiful Books

    Jul 26 2022

    Luke joins the show from Bismarck, ND, where he’s learning the lay of the land. Meanwhile, Andrew made his first trip to the new TBTL PO Box and found it overflowing with correspondence from Tens of Listeners.

  • #3734 TBTL: Back In Caption

    Jul 25 2022

    Andrew is upset that his submission to the New Yorker cartoon caption contest didn’t win after seeing the finalists. Speaking of the New Yorker, Luke is fascinated by a piece about the VW minibus, which was apparently somewhat inspired by something called “The Chicken Wars.”  Photo of VW minibus by OrangeChallenger, licensed under Creative Commons.

  • #3733 Tom’s Of Mayonnaise

    Jul 22 2022

    Luke does something really, really terrible during the show involving [trigger warning] coffee and mayonnaise. Plus, Dr. Oz’s social media team continues to get completely roasted by his opponent’s campaign. And Andrew tries to tackle the age-old question: What’s worse, listening to someone talk about their dreams or listening to someone talk about their fantasy baseball team? 

  • #3732 Rex In Effect

    Jul 21 2022

    Luke has introduced spray bottles into his relationship with his cat, and it’s changed everything. Plus, a woman earned a job interview after responding to a rejection letter with a goofy meme.

  • #3731 Well Behaved Kittens Rarely Make History

    Jul 20 2022

    Andrew is working to change the way he talks to his cat -- and all pets in general. Plus, a minor league baseball GM gets a prostate exam while singing “Take Me Out To The Ballgame”, although it’s not entirely clear why. And Luke and Andrew try to figure out why they are completely uninterested in the Game of Thrones sequel.

  • #3730 Schrödinger's Camera

    Jul 19 2022

    Luke has thoughts on the new, buzzy Nathan Fielder show, The Rehearsal. He and Andrew also come up with a new segment idea for TBTL.

  • #3729 Morgan A Feeling

    Jul 18 2022

    Luke just got back from Austin, where he gathered with friends to pay tribute to the late, great Drew McFrizz. Meanwhile, Andrew was almost denied an opportunity to clean a big mess in peace. Plus, something very interesting happened at an Omaha airport over the weekend. 

  • #3728 The Deal Hunter

    Jul 15 2022

    The CEO of Costco has made it clear that the store will NOT be raising prices on its cheap hot dogs, even if it is a money-losing venture. This gives Andrew the opportunity to ask Luke a very important question about the way he consumes soda pop. 

  • #3727 Chart Of Escalation

    Jul 14 2022

    Andrew learns something shocking about his own past. And an article in the New York Times helps Luke understand how he became a pathological liar (JUST KIDDING).

  • #3726 What A Kroc

    Jul 13 2022

    Luke runs into some problems in his quest to reprint an Andre The Giant photo, and it’s making Andrew feeling a little panicky. They also talk about the time Ray Kroc commandeered a stadium PA system to call his own ballplayers “stupid.” And Andrew accidentally entered a humor contest while on the toilet.

  • #3725 P.O.d-à-Terre

    Jul 12 2022

    Luke returns to the bar that has his favorite, mysterious Andre The Giant photo hanging on the wall, and he asks the owner if he can borrow it. Plus, a stolen Olympic medal is discovered in an old McDonald’s bag. And Andrew is excited that TBTL finally has a P.O. Box!

  • #3724 There’s A Right Way To Rock And A Wrong Way To Rigmarole

    Jul 11 2022

    Luke has finally found true happiness, and he has video to prove it. Plus, a listener sheds some important light on Luke’s recent adventures at The Home Depot. And a drunk newscaster gives it her all in Albany.

  • #3723 A Work Of Dart

    Jul 08 2022

    Luke joins the show from Port Townsend, where he’s falling in love with the small maritime village all over again. Meanwhile, Andrew (and his camera) got teased on the bus recently. And two Oregon cities are battling over a claim to “the world’s smallest park.”

  • #3722 Mayo Culpa

    Jul 07 2022

    Andrew does some old-fashioned, shoe-leather reporting at his local Subway shop to find out what’s really going on with the restaurant’s menu changes. He and Luke also offer a somewhat delayed review of No Country For Old Men. And they discuss the rise of “GentleMinions”, who are disrupting screenings of the new Minions movie. 

  • #3721 It’s My Way Or The Subway

    Jul 06 2022

    Andrew is very agitated about upcoming changes to the sandwich menu at Subway. Luke had a real scare with his cat, Bubbles, this morning. And a listener needs help navigating a small-ish issue with his neighbor.

  • #3720 I’m Not A Lawnmower Man, I’m A Lawnmower, Man!

    Jul 05 2022

    Luke and Andrew began their 4th of July Weekend hoping to get a lawnmower and a dog, respectively. Today they report back on their adventures. 

  • #3719 Yes, Mayhem

    Jul 04 2022

    Luke’s attempts to get his hands on a lawnmower continue throughout the show, as he receives many updates and mixed messages from hardware stores around the Pacific Northwest. Plus, the internet is desperately trying to find the woman who won almost all the cooking prizes at a Virginia-Kentucky district  fair.

  • #3718 Yo Gabapentin

    Jul 01 2022

    Andrew’s dog-ological clock is ticking again, Luke runs into issues buying a new lawnmower, and the Marsupial Gurgle website is entering a new phase of life.

  • #3717 It’s A Zeller’s Market

    Jun 30 2022

    Bubbles the Cat got up to a lot of trouble in Luke’s studio yesterday, almost completely sabotaging today’s show. Plus, employees at Medieval Times want to unionize, Bed, Bath and Beyond stores may be cutting air conditioning to save money, and AirBNB says “no more parties!”

  • #3716 The Rural Brewer

    Jun 29 2022

    Andrew went to the dump yesterday, where he hoped to avoid getting “hollered at.” Results were mixed. Plus, Luke is in email hell. And a drunk man in Japan lost a thumb drive containing personal and banking information of a half a million people. Photo of Shoreline Transfer Station art by Martin Auad via Creative Commons license. The photo in the transfer station is called Terra Firma by photographer Steve McGehee.

  • #3715 Jerry Of The Jungle

    Jun 28 2022

    Andrew’s War On Blackberries leads to an encounter with a new neighbor. Luke almost struck a deal with the world’s sketchiest electrician. And a listener shares an incredibly cringy story from the workplace.

  • #3714 Bramblin’ Man

    Jun 27 2022

    Andrew went to war with blackberry bushes this weekend. Luke took his shirt off at a pool party. And a Mariners fan somehow managed to get pizza delivered to a bummed-out baseball player at Angel Stadium during a game. 

  • #3713 A Supremely Bad Day

    Jun 24 2022

    Luke and Andrew try to process the Supreme Court’s decision to overturn Roe vs Wade. Plus, Andrew got fired from a job yesterday. (Sorry, it wasn’t TBTL.) 

  • #3712 Pho Fighters

    Jun 23 2022

    After hearing from many listeners, Luke has a new theory as to why some characters pronounce the word “bear” like “bar.” Andrew disagrees. Plus, a sriracha shortage may be around the corner, and a photojournalist captures a breathtaking moment as a swimming coach makes an underwater rescue.

  • #3711 Diss And Vinegar

    Jun 22 2022

    Luke taste-tests the new “Healthy Coke” alternative, which is essentially vinegar and water. Andrew does not. Plus, Luke met Russell Wilson last night and encouraged him to reprise his Mr. Unlimited character.

  • #3710 A World Of Yurt

    Jun 21 2022

    Luke and Andrew discuss foldable shovels, tents you can’t touch in the rain, and how time-lapse photography is getting Luke through his renovation projects. 

  • #3709 Headbutt First, Ask Questions Later

    Jun 20 2022

    The universe tried to thwart Luke’s plans to enjoy an outdoor concert this weekend, but fun prevailed! Plus, Bubble The Cat gives Luke a scare, and a TBTL Ten teaches the boys something important about beach tar.

  • #3708 Getting Jiggle With It

    Jun 18 2022

    Andrew and Luke (with a little help from the New York Times) dig deep into the charming and fascinating story behind the “Jiggle Jiggle” rap that’s taken over TikTok and the world. 

  • #3707 Cliffs Nopes

    Jun 16 2022

    Listeners go into deep sleuth mode to try to find the origins of Luke’s new favorite photo of Andre the Giant. Plus, competing op-eds in the Washington Post debate the pros-and-cons of digital QR code menus in restaurants. 

  • #3706 Didn’t Know You Like To Get Sweat, Though

    Jun 15 2022

    Luke and Andrew marvel over “Fake Klay Thompson'' getting access to the court at the NBA Finals because he kind of sort of looks a little like the real Klay Thompson. Plus, Luke stumbles on the coolest photograph he’s ever seen, and he needs help tracking it down. 

  • #3705 Burbank’s Hierarchy Of Worries

    Jun 14 2022

    Sweden has rolled out some sexy-talking garbage cans and Andrew is not into it. Meanwhile, the Space Needle owners are suing a coffee company over a logo that subtly uses the shape of the Space Needle, leading Luke to wonder about the legal status of tossed salad and scrambled eggs. (They’re calling again.) 

  • #3704 Bearly Andrew

    Jun 13 2022

    A listener stumbles on a sketch that looks like Andrew…or does it? That’s the debate. Plus, Luke’s attempts to return a demolition tool go sideways at Home Depot.

  • #3703 Ah, That’s My Brain!

    Jun 10 2022

    Luke got a taste of the sweet new Wait, Wait Don’t Tell Me digs last night. And Andrew has a new catch phrase. And scientists are checking their hypotenuses on water consumption for humans.

  • #3702 A Pyramid Of Nonsense

    Jun 09 2022

    Luke’s seatmate on his trip to Chicago has him thinking about the world at large, and how he moves through it. Meanwhile, Andrew’s trying to figure out a dang meme and his dang Ticketmaster app, each to no avail.

  • #3701 The Man In The High Russell

    Jun 08 2022

    Luke is considering a “dopamine reset”, while Andrew learns that he really got away with something on his recent trip to the King County dump. 

  • #3700 Mr. Unliiiiiiivable!

    Jun 07 2022

    Luke and Andrew try to discuss their respective Britta water filters without sounding tooooo fancy. Plus, Luke destroyed part of his home with a mini-hammer yesterday…and he’s just getting started!

  • #3699 Seize The Bidet

    Jun 06 2022

    Luke ran a half-marathon that he wasn’t fully prepared for. It went both better and worse than he expected. Plus, Tens of listeners weigh-in on Septic Tank Talk, and Andrew has a new puttering project.

  • #3698 Don’t Be Careful What You Wish For

    Jun 03 2022

    Luke picked up the phone to make a difficult phone call today, taking a major step in his own personal growth. Plus, the faceless company that owns the rights to Elvis Presley’s image and likeness is cracking down on Elvis-themed weddings in Vegas.

  • #3697 Kempting Fate

    Jun 02 2022

    Luke has a very satisfying adventure with his new septic tank, and Andrew takes a trip to the Shoreline dump, where he was inevitably hollered at. Plus, Luke is puzzled by a couple of homemade bumper stickers, and his cat Bubbles has learned how to fly. 

  • #3696 There’s A Wrong Way To Right-Size

    Jun 01 2022

    Luke and Andrew are beguiled by a homemade bumper sticker created by one Walter Burbank. They also discuss the major league baseball player who has an almost comic ability to hit home runs at the exact wrong time.

  • #3695 The Scootercycle Diaries

    May 31 2022

    Andrew’s drive home from Denver was less uneventful than he had hoped, but he learned a lesson or two along the way. And Luke here’s back from his AirBNB host after sending him a few gentle suggestions for future guests.

  • #3694 If You Can’t Handle Me At My Ben Gibbard, Then You Don’t Deserve Me At My Bon Iver

    May 30 2022

    Luke and Andrew wrap-up their adventures in Denver with a final walk-through of their AirBNB and an accidental visit to the Adult Bookstore district. 

  • #3693 Copyrights And Copywrongs

    May 27 2022

    Luke and Andrew wrap-up this year’s TBTL-a-Thon as Andrew plots-out his trip back home and Luke plots to stay in Denver forever.

  • #3692 Responsibly Snoozed

    May 26 2022

    Day Four of the TBTL-a-Thon arrives and finds Andrew and Luke oversleeping and trying to trick Enterprise into giving Andrew a new rental car…which was QUITE the adventure.

  • #3691 Pizza Is My Co-Pilot

    May 25 2022

    Luke and Andrew try to offer the Tens of listeners a distraction from the gut-wrenching news of the day by examining Andrew’ snack choices on his road trip out to Denver this week. They also take calls from listeners who have wifi stories and some amazing kitten advice to share. 

  • #3690 The Mitsubishi Massage

    May 24 2022

    Andrew celebrates two big technology wins as he and Luke stream the show live from Denver for Day 2 of the TBTL-a-Thon. Plus, Luke jogged past Russell Wilson’s new football home today and felt some feelings.

  • #3689 There’s Something About The Soul Of A Yaris

    May 23 2022

    Live From Denver! Luke and Andrew kick off TBTL-A-THON 13 with a live-streamed broadcast from their temporary studio. They also try to figure out what drives Andrew’s car-rental decisions and if their AirBNB is owned by a Scientologist. Plus, phone calls! Fun!

  • #3688 Phyllistrations

    May 20 2022

    TBTL Friendo Phyllis “Fletch” Fletcher stops by to talk about her newest journalistic endeavors and to help Luke and Andrew announce the new TBTL-a-Thon donor gifts! 

  • #3687 You’re On Thin Eggs, Buddy!

    May 19 2022

    Now Luke’s having TBTL-a-Thon stress dreams, and he’s locked in Kafkaesque a battle with his internet provider. Meanwhile, Andrew shares some fond memories of winters on Lake Winnipesaukee.

  • #3686 Get A Load Of This Kai

    May 18 2022

    A quick mention of Mike Tyson’s Punch Out becomes anything but quick once Luke discovers a special YouTube video related to the topic. Plus, Andrew is trying to take lessons from his stress dreams as the TBTL-a-Thon approaches. And a kid named Kai got to live his own dream when he was invited to drum with Pearl Jam. 

  • #3685 Big Clammy Energy

    May 17 2022

    Luke and Andrew wonder which one of them would win if they arm wrestled each other, but they make no plans to do so. They also inexpertly discuss the design flaws of some of the Galactic Empire’s transport vehicles.

  • #3684 And You Don’t Believe In A Todd?

    May 16 2022

    Luke joins the show from the storied Algonquin Hotel in New York City, where he’s doing his best “Dorothy Parker After A Long Jog” imitation. Meanwhile, Andrew’s anxiety about the upcoming TBTL-a-Thon is reaching new, albeit unjustified, heights.

  • #3683 Deuterocanonical Deets

    May 13 2022

    Luke and Andrew discuss cats, kittens, Showtime at the Apollo, smokeless tobacco, Baz Luhrmann screeners, TBTL trivia night, cycling, lawnmowers, tractors, Tweety Bird t-shirts, and, of course, the Shroud of Turin.

  • #3682 The Show, It Makes Us Old

    May 12 2022

    A quick apology to Luke turns into a half-hour conversation about the viscosity of condiments. Plus, Andrew accidentally found himself embroiled in a home project last night involving something that looks like a little robot head.

  • #3681 Bagetting The Question

    May 11 2022

    Luke finally brought his new kitten home yesterday, and he’s deeply, madly in love…although it was tough to take her away from her first family. We get all the deets on that, plus, Jon Bon Jovi seems to be losing his voice, and people are concerned.

  • #3680 You Gonna Finnish That?

    May 10 2022

    Apparently Canadian astronauts are no longer allowed to commit space murder. Plus, Luke’s getting his kitten tonight!

  • #3679 The Space Noodle

    May 09 2022

    Luke tweeted a photo from the Seattle airport this weekend, and it got the attention of some city leaders. Will Luke be the change he wants to see in the world?

  • #3678 Dino Night

    May 06 2022

    TBTL Friendo Brendan Francis Newnam hops on the show to talk about his new travel podcast, Not Lost, which includes a fateful trip to Vegas with one Luke Burbank. Plus, Andrew finally opens up about the first time he saw Jurassic Park.

  • #3677 Whole Glottal Love

    May 05 2022

    Now that The Seattle Sounders are the best soccer team in North America, Luke and Andrew try to jump on the bandwagon. Meanwhile Andrew refuses to hear Luke’s compelling argument as to why he should install a Pickle Ball court at his new house.

  • #3676 Let’s Turn This Milhouse Into A Milhome

    May 04 2022

    Luke joins Andrew in his new studio for the first time to discuss his serendipitous morning and a chance meeting in the Greenlake neighborhood. Plus, new details are out about the woman who fell down a trail toilet during a hike recently. The details are dazzling.

  • #3675 I Know What You Were Singing Last Summer

    May 03 2022

    Luke and Andrew deal with a verifiably Bad News Day for America by soaking up some radio sunshine from the Tens of Listeners. Luke joins the show from Stockton, California, which happens to be home to one of TBTL’s youngest fans. He and Andrew also hear from a youthful singing sensation on the TBTL voicemail line.

  • #3674 A Couple Of Dopes Talking About Soaps!

    May 02 2022

    Luke suffered some DEEP embarrassment at the airport yesterday, but Andrew talks him through it. They also learn about one man’s efforts to recycle gently used bars of soap left behind in hotels.

  • #3673 Repo Boys Becoming Repo Men

    Apr 29 2022

    Luke is obsessed with a new TikTok trend that is very difficult to describe, but that doesn’t stop him and Andrew from trying! Plus, Luke’s favorite magazine gets an exclusive interview with the man who was secretly recorded dipping his hot dog into his beer at a Yankees game.

  • #3672 The Ancient Art Of Belgian Phone Throwing

    Apr 28 2022

    Something incredible happened to Luke earlier this week, and he didn’t even plan on telling us about it. What the heck? He and Andrew also discuss the story of a woman who called 911 after falling down into an outhouse toilet. 

  • #3671 I Am The One Who Grumps!

    Apr 27 2022

    Johnny Depp said something in court yesterday that stopped Luke in his tracks. Plus, the truckers orchestrating a protest convoy found themselves in the worst situation they could possibly imagine. It involved gridlocked traffic, Berkeley students, and an endless supply of eggs.

  • #3670 And You Don’t Believe In A Bird?

    Apr 26 2022

    We joke a lot about “hot takes” on TBTL, but Luke has two very legitimate hot takes today, one of which was inspired by a photo of Henry Winkler. Luke and Andrew also discuss whether it’s time to bring robot umpires into baseball, and Andrew becomes obsessed with tracking down a particularly bad Chevy Chase movie.

  • #3669 Feel The Electrizzzity

    Apr 25 2022

    Luke and Andrew gear up for the Great Twitter Takeover by Elon Musk. They also compare notes on some home renovation projects, one of which led Andrew to almost have a freakout at Home Depot this weekend.

  • #3668 Spare The Roku Stick, Spoil The Television

    Apr 22 2022

    CNN’s new streaming service is already history, and Netflix is struggling with its own numbers. Luke and Andrew weigh-in on the landscape of modern media….and on Paul F. Tompkins’ Cameo videos, which are PERFECT. 

  • #3667 Last Night’s Fish Today

    Apr 21 2022

    Stephen King (the author) offered the internet a unique fish recipe the other day, and boy oh boy, did it cause a stir. Plus, the Seattle Mariners have explained why they stopped playing Louie Louie during the 7th inning stretch, but their reasoning doesn’t satisfy Luke and Andrew.

  • #3666 You Should Smiley More

    Apr 20 2022

    Andrew’s latest home project leads to an online shopping mistake that is haunting him. Plus, Luke is starting to really come around on this Nicolas Cage guy!

  • #3665 We Have The Steams!

    Apr 19 2022

    Andrew is very worried about today’s Wordle puzzle based on what he’s seeing in his Wordle chat group. Meanwhile, Luke’s been digging the new HBO show Our Flag Means Death, AND he has an update on his new kitty, Bubbles, whom he’s currently in a long distance relationship with.

  • #3664 Louie Booey

    Apr 18 2022

    Luke and Andrew have some big plans for this year’s TBTL-a-Thon, and they’re excited to share them. Also, Luke has some personal news of his own he’d like to share. (Don’t worry, it’s good news!)

  • #3663 That’s What They Said On “Ask Vieves”

    Apr 15 2022

    Luke is officially a “glasses guy” now. And Andrew, apparently, is a “shelf guy”? Also, Elon Musk’s attempted takeover of Twitter sends Luke and Andrew (and eventually Genevieve!) down a Cheers rabbit hole.

  • #3662 Have A Cow, Friend!

    Apr 14 2022

    Andrew has developed a strong curiosity around Charleston Chews, and he might just act on it. Also, Luke is shocked to hear that a streaming platform with a household name has a smaller audience than TBTL.

  • #3661 …And Then, The Thinkable Happened

    Apr 13 2022

    Luke is considering doing something completely against his nature, and Andrew tries to guess what it is. They also look back at the life and career of Gilbert Gottfried, including his most important work on USA’s “Up All Night,” which many mainstream publications have overlooked.

  • #3660 Woodworf & Bernstein

    Apr 12 2022

    Andrew tries to help Luke solve a mystery surrounding a little league baseball card from Luke’s youth. Plus, an enterprise reporter is upset that people are stealing his stories and turning them into podcast series. Is there anything he can do?

  • #3659 Mackinac And Me

    Apr 11 2022

    Luke had a little accident in his apartment this weekend, and now he may have a new scar to show off the next time he’s hunting sharks with a guy named Quint. He also has some thoughts about last night’s finale of Severance, but Andrew doesn’t want to hear them.

  • #3658 Dr. Wham-O’s Monster

    Apr 08 2022

    Andrew mowed his lawn for the first time yesterday and offers Luke a complete report. They also debate which of their childhood “flying novelty discs” was better. And they gear up for today’s big Seattle Mariners season opener!

  • #3657 The Mow Before The Snow

    Apr 07 2022

    Luke and Andrew are hoping to take advantage of today’s 70 degree weather before the snow comes this weekend. Because everything is fine and that’s how weather is supposed to work. Plus, we have a big update on the Patty Moriarty mystery that led Luke and Andrew to Larrimah, Australia a few years ago.

  • #3656 I Thought It Sounded Bad…On The Outside!

    Apr 06 2022

    A listener helps Luke track down the audio of his very first radio show from the 1990s, leading to a true moment of inception on TBTL. Plus, the Washington Post has published an absolutely fascinating story of a carpet cleaner in DC who speaks 24 languages.

  • #3655 Are You Ready For A Dateline!

    Apr 05 2022

    Luke discovers a TV show from 1976 that is blowing his mind. Andrew learns that he’s living with a Slender Man. And a listener’s in-laws turn on the TV to see that they’ve made the local news.

  • #3654 Hairy Pottersville

    Apr 04 2022

    Luke and Andrew are worried about the friendship between Will Ferrell and Adam McKay….despite enjoying the project that caused the apparent rift. They also listen to the best/worst radio intro currently on Seattle’s airwaves. And Luke made a lasagna.

  • #3653 Stolen Valkyrie

    Apr 01 2022

    Former Seattle quarterback Russell Wilson has a new “NFT-powered hydration drink brand aimed at Gen Z consumers,” because of course he does. Plus, Luke might have offended the world's biggest fish painting fan. 

  • #3652 Blursed Lines

    Mar 31 2022

    Luke and Andrew listen to the new official song of the Cleveland Guardians, the city’s recently-rebranded baseball team. They also discuss Washington’s new state sport, pickleball, and Andrew quizzes Luke on other state’s official sports.

  • #3651 Fix It. (Sunglasses Guy Emoji)

    Mar 30 2022

    Andrew set foot in Costco for the first time ever yesterday and has a full report. He and Luke also discuss their own awkward brand of email etiquette, and they listen to Paul Rudd prank Conan O’Brien once again, despite all odds. 

  • #3650 The Costco Of Doing Business

    Mar 29 2022

    Luke is in Hawaii, but all hell is breaking loose at his apartment building back home. Meanwhile, Andrew’s chair is pranking him, and -- unrelatedly -- he’s just beginning to learn about The Costco Culture.

  • #3649 Whom Startled Who?

    Mar 28 2022

    Andrew is disoriented in his brand new studio, while Luke joins the show from Waimea, Hawaii, where he can hear his neighbors through the wall. Nonetheless, they are here to talk about what happened at the Oscars ceremony last night.

  • #3648 Come Flail Away, Come Flail Away With Meeeee

    Mar 25 2022

    Today is the final day Andrew will record TBTL from his Roosevelt District studio, and he marks the occasion the only way he knows how: By talking about antiquated technologies and the weird feeling you get when you watch a cable guy drill a hole directly though your house. He and Luke also discuss the story of a woman who took it upon herself to entertain a crowd waiting for a film to begin at a Burbank theater. 

  • #3647 I’m Walkin’ Here! So I Appreciate Your Patience. Thank You.

    Mar 24 2022

    Seattle is going to install “Driver Report Cards” at intersections to make waiting for pedestrians more fun or something. Luke and Andrew are a little confused about the details. Plus, Luke wants to adopt a cat named Thimble. Who wouldn’t?!

  • #3646 The Boston Marketplace Of Ideas

    Mar 23 2022

    Luke got lost on a jog this morning and had to call for help. But he’s okay. Plus, a single mention of Boston Market quickly becomes an obsession for Andrew. And we hear from Tens of listeners who use the TBTL voicemail line to tell stories of garbage-related shenanigans and to seek help for breakfast-related conundrums.

  • #3645 Cilia Rabbit, Facts Are For Luke!

    Mar 22 2022

    Luke finds himself in a nightmare transportation situation in Los Angeles, until he remembers a very old school solution. Plus, Andrew goes down memory lane and relives one of the more embarrassing moments of his adult life.

  • #3644 Pedam If You Got ‘Em!

    Mar 21 2022

    Another day, another Wheel of Fortune head-scratcher. Luke and Andrew discuss the latest buffoonery from Pat Sajak and the gang. Plus, Andrew says goodbye to the Cleveland Browns after a very disappointing (and very angering) turn of events.

  • #3643 John Papas YOU!

    Mar 18 2022

    The internet has unearthed a McDonald’s character that time had almost left behind. Luke and Andrew look back at the life and legacy of Uncle O’Grimacey and debunk rumors of his connections to the I.R.A. Plus, a Papa John’s franchisee in the U.S. decides to keep his restaurants open in Russia, because it’s unfair to deny Russian citizens their share of subpar pizza.

  • #3642 All That Racquet

    Mar 17 2022

    Andrew confesses that the reason he always wanted to move to a city was so he could bounce rubber balls off of walls. Plus, Luke’s been digging the brand new Netflix docuseries, Bad Vegan. And a Dazzling Donor introduces a new mystery involving a TBTL audio drop. 

  • #3641 This Are The Days

    Mar 16 2022

    Luke and Andrew are convinced they’re getting trolled by Annie Lennox AND Wheel of Fortune at the same time. Plus, the debate over Daylight Saving Time is tearing this country apart but bringing Congress together.

  • #3640 Nose To The Rhinestone

    Mar 15 2022

    Producers of the The Goldbergs are still trying to use Jeff Garlin’s likeness long after he left the TV show, but the results are upsetting. Luke and Andrew also discuss “frost quakes,” Superman’s mustache, and the way Sylvester Stallone pronounced “butter” in Rhinestone Cowboy.

  • #3639 From G.A.T. To S.P.L.A.T.

    Mar 14 2022

    After almost an entire month of retirement, Tom Brady says he’s ready to play football again! Andrew and Luke try to figure out why. Plus, some Wheel of Fortune fans are calling Pat Sajak a H_P_CRI_E. And a listener has launched an investigation into a frustrating garbage collection scandal that goes all the way to the top!

  • #3638 Bullying On The Byways

    Mar 11 2022

    A guy in a Ron Jon shirt  totally tried to fight Luke at a carwash yesterday! Also, he and Andrew receive some shocking Shrek-related news about the new Batman movie. (Sorry, the new The Batman movie.)

  • #3637 Take The Hutch, Leave The Cannoli

    Mar 10 2022

    Expert free-stuff-getter Genevieve swings by to help a listener who has an ethical dilemma involving some furniture she found in her neighborhood.

  • #3636 You Can’t Be Seri-Russ

    Mar 09 2022

    Tens of listeners help Luke and Andrew untangle their confusion over Greek and Latin number prefixes (not that they really needed any help, of course.) Luke also had to help his inconsolable mother process the news of Russell Wilson leaving Seattle yesterday. And Andrew receives some Very Big News during the show that may or may not be related to curbside garbage pickup.

  • #3635 Lonely Planet Of The Apes

    Mar 08 2022

    Those number crunchers over at WordfinderX claim that more people are cheating at Wordle than ever before. Luke and Andrew discuss this, and then they try to figure out the Greek Alphabet in a segment that will haunt TBTL listeners for decades to come. (“Deca” means “ten!”)

  • #3634 I Miss The Old Pluto

    Mar 07 2022

    Andrew thought he had the PERFECT content to bring to TBTL today, but his plans hit a very large practical snag. Plus, Luke has been enjoying the new Kanye documentary as well as a much heavier doc called The Other Side. And Luke and Andrew call a motivational voicemail line created by kids for kids.

  • #3633 If It Walks Like A Zuck And Sings Like A Zuck

    Mar 04 2022

    It’s been almost a full week since the internet produced a video so cringy it made us want to burn the whole thing down. But luckily, our long wait is over thanks to the musical stylings (and NFT enthusiasm) of Mark Zuckerberg’s sister, Randi.

  • #3632 You Can’t Play Anything Anymore

    Mar 03 2022

    Things finally get good about 90 minutes into today’s podcast when Andrew plays archival tape of Paul Simon explaining how he wrote “Bridge Over Troubled Water.” Plus, Pat Sajak is surprisingly funny on Twitter, where he’s also standing up for the contestants who embarrassed themselves on Wheel Of Fortune this week.

  • #3631 Joe Versus The VolCarole

    Mar 02 2022

    Luke and Andrew clench their way through the most frustrating 4 minutes in the history of Wheel of Fortune. Plus, a new Disney Star Wars resort is getting bad reviews, but it still seems like a good place to get tight on space booze.

  • #3630 Booze You Can’t Use

    Mar 01 2022

    Some pretty big things are happening in Andrew’s life, which of course Luke views as a victory for himself. Plus, some states are outlawing “Russian” vodka, although their efforts might be misguided.

  • #3629 Dusting For Prince

    Feb 28 2022

    Luke and Andrew once again turn their attention to the Seattle Times’ Rants and Raves column, where one contributor is putting the whole R&R system on trial. Plus, Luke talked to someone involved with the crime scene he witnessed from his window last week, and their story is jaw-dropping.

  • #3628 No More Tiers

    Feb 25 2022

    A major crime scene is unfolding outside Luke’s window, and he’s determined to find out what’s going on. Plus, what happens when your watch is a phone, but then it stops being a phone? And a thicc bear accused of making some trouble in Tahoe has been getting a bad rap.

  • #3627 Cotton Eye No

    Feb 24 2022

    Luke and Andrew receive an exciting invitation to a public radio partnership; Their only concern is creating something that is TOO good. Plus, a bizarre promotional video starring celebrities of yesteryear leads to some shocking revelations about Rednex, the Swedish(!) band behind Cotton Eye Joe.

  • #3626 Yumming Our Yucks

    Feb 23 2022

    A comedian is catching some flack for making fun of Ted Lasso fans on Twitter, and Matt Stafford (sort of?) apologizes for his response to a photographer’s nasty fall off of a stage right in front of him. And another young TBTL listener is using the voicemail line to workshop some jokes.

  • #3625 Lost Luggage And Long Femurs

    Feb 22 2022

    Andrew joins the show from his hometown of Cleveland, Ohio, where he’s doing his best to keep his composure in the face of some (minor) technical issues. Meanwhile, back in Washington, sea lions are under attack in the “Rants and Raves” section of the Seattle Times. 

  • #3624 Shame Game

    Feb 21 2022

    Luke and Andrew have every intention of tackling a special Presidents’ Day quiz, but things go off the rails when a listener sends them a clue to the latest TBTL mystery.

  • #3623 Wendt In Doubt

    Feb 18 2022

    An exhaustive investigation into Norm’s bar tab on Cheers leads to an episode of TBTL that any podcast consultant would love: long, rambly, and with a LOT of questionable math. 

  • #3622 The Wolf Of Walnut Grove

    Feb 17 2022

    Luke finally reaches out to England to find out whether his new favorite dog has been adopted yet or what! Plus, Matthew Stafford watches a photographer fall off a tall stage and just walks away, raising some questions about how he regards the people around him. 

  • #3621 Pressing The Moot Button With Luke Burp-Bank

    Feb 16 2022

    Luke and Andrew are loving the new Netflix show Murderville. Also, CBS has an ingeniously evil way of promoting its new procedurals. And there’s a reason Luke and Andrew are afraid of hotel telephones. (Open tape via @MaxAndIvan on Twitter.)

  • #3620 Lu’s Clues

    Feb 15 2022

    Luke is cooking up a possible TBTL adventure involving international travel and a canine namesake. Andrew is trying to solve a TBTL mystery involving a decades-old gubernatorial race in Tennessee. And that Nicole Kidman commercial showing in AMC theaters apparently has a cult following. 

  • #3619 Just A Matter Of Halftime

    Feb 14 2022

    Luke finds himself deeper in the Marvel Comics universe than he ever imagined, but he’s still more of an Archie Comics kind of guy. He and Andrew also review yesterday’s Super Bowl Halftime show and a commercial that was so good it was actually bad. 

  • #3618 Luke, I Am Your Zaddy

    Feb 11 2022

    Luke finds himself in a Twitter beef with one of public radio’s biggest stars. Plus, the largest asset seizure in US history also shined a spotlight on an unlikely (and ill advised) rap career.

  • #3617 V Is For Thursday

    Feb 10 2022

    Luke learns the one question he’s not allowed to ask Amy Poehler when he interviews her. And now he wants to ask it, of course. Plus, a weird glitch is forcing some Mazda owners in Seattle to listen to public radio.

  • #3616 North Of Annoyed, South Of Loving It

    Feb 09 2022

    Listeners help Luke and Andrew solve two TBTL mysteries and help them find a long lost audio drop. Also, Leslie Jones has been the best part of Olympic coverage so far, but her commentaries have been getting pulled from social media because NBC is dumb. 

  • #3615 Respect Your Alders

    Feb 08 2022

    Did you know that the Olympics are happening right now? It’s true! But nobody seems to be watching. Plus, some PNW Orcas are bringing back a fish fad from the 1980s, and Joe Rogan still has his Spotify podcast, to Luke’s surprise.

  • #3614 Bell Yeah!

    Feb 07 2022

    Luke digs through a mountain of emails from listeners trying to help him find his “Mystery Song.” And Andrew spent a full day at the movies, expanding his horizons. 

  • #3613 I’m A Wordle Not A Shurdle

    Feb 04 2022

    Luke is falling in love with the absolute weirdness of Montana Public Radio. Plus, Minnesota has some of the best snow plow names, but the schoolchildren of Vermont are offering some competition.

  • #3612 It Comes With The Teritony

    Feb 03 2022

    Luke may be trapped in a cabin in snowy Montana, and Andrew’s working on something that’s not funny enough to be stand-up material and not interesting enough to be a monolog. Plus the Washington Football Team announces a new name that is somehow less interesting than “The Washington Football Team.”

  • #3611 I Shot The Sheriff, But I Brought No Harm To The Sheriff’s Assistant

    Feb 02 2022

    The kid who “wrote a book” and hid it in a library is getting more and more attention, and the volume now has a waiting list of several years. Andrew remains unimpressed. Meanwhile, Luke is still trying to figure out why a piano tune on TikTok sounds so familiar to him.

  • #3610 Where’s On First?

    Feb 01 2022

    The New York Times bought Wordle, a hapless cruise ship scrubbed a satellite launch, and Luke wants to live like a Seattle tech bro. Plus, Tens of listeners help Luke try to identify a piano song he heard on TikTok. 

  • #3609 We Bought A Zoom

    Jan 31 2022

    Luke stumbled on a clip of someone playing the piano recently, and he needs YOUR HELP identifying the tune. Plus, Spotify’s solution to the Joe Rogan misinformation problem is…lacking.

  • #3608 Snatching Awkwardness From The Jaws Of Comfort

    Jan 28 2022

    Andrew opens up and tells Luke about one of his weirder habits, though some things should probably remain private. They also discuss eggs (they’re legit kind of weird, right?), and Andrew sucks all the fun out of a cute story about a kid in a library.

  • #3607 A Grip, Not A Gripe

    Jan 27 2022

    Luke is obsessed with some cleaning-related videos he’s found on YouTube…but they aren’t cleaning what you think (I promise.) And it turns out HBO might actually be TV after all! 

  • #3606 The Bird Is The Word

    Jan 26 2022

    Luke made a spontaneous gesture a few nights ago, and now he’s a bit worried about the repercussions. Speaking of repercussions, Luke also stole Paris Hilton’s NFT, and now he’s waiting to see what happens. Meanwhile, Andrew remains a very good boy. 

  • #3605 Shrimp And Save

    Jan 25 2022

    Luke finally filled-out his 2022 calendar this morning and he is FEELING GOOD. Plus, a woman found out she actually won millions of dollars when she checked her spam folder. (Aren’t we not supposed to click on those emails?) 

  • #3604 Let’s Go Rebrandin’

    Jan 24 2022

    Andrew is auditioning new Tonight Pants, Luke learns The Truth about JNCO jeans, and the orange M&M guy is going to start tying his shoes already.

  • #3603 Bad Tim-ing

    Jan 21 2022

    Luke and Andrew pay tribute to the late Louie Anderson and listen back to his greatest gambling story. Plus, the news anchor who showed little empathy when his colleague was hit by a car on live TV is trying to convince the world that he is a human with real feelings. Luke and Andrew travel back in TBTL history to find out if Luke displayed any empathy when Andrew was once injured on the job.

  • #3602 Dick Clarks Ask The Darndest Things

    Jan 20 2022

    Luke and Andrew give Genevieve a call so she can describe the TERRIBLE movie trailer she saw this weekend (Sorry, Owen Wilson.) Plus, Luke is delighted by  a couple of pieces of audio he stumbled on recently, including sound of a reporter who got hit by a car live on TV. And Andrew comes up with a great new catch phrase…but then forgets it immediately :(

  • #3601 The M Is For Micro, The S Is For Soft

    Jan 19 2022

    Luke has a big tattoo decision to make, and he’s only got 3 hours to figure it out. Plus, Andrew’s been watching some weird stuff with his new screen projector. And a listener has some powerful new intel on a theater promotional tool from 2003 that has loomed large in Andrew’s relationship.

  • #3600 You Can Say Everything Anymore!

    Jan 18 2022

    Luke and Andrew have about 40 minutes worth of observations and questions about the “Comedy” section of Cameo. They also discuss the story of a couple vandals who ended up getting caught because they didn’t tip a bartender. 

  • #3599 Wrong Like Bull

    Jan 17 2022

    Luke and Andrew embarrass themselves by trying to answer the Jeopardy! questions that the show’s current champion got wrong. They also finally find their niche in the vast world of podcasting.

  • #3598 The Mundanity Of Hope

    Jan 14 2022

    Luke and Andrew discuss their aversions to sharing food, even if it’s a “bass drum full of popcorn.” Plus, listener Tim shares his amazing tale of high school truancy and his road to eventual redemption. 

  • #3597 A Double Negative Of Political Urinal Stickers

    Jan 13 2022

    Luke and Andrew hop on the Wordle craze that is taking the internet by storm. Plus, Andrew is getting plagued by spam phone calls and he doesn’t know what to do about it.

  • #3596 Don’t Bring A Scalpel To A Sledgehammer Fight

    Jan 12 2022

    Luke is calling Day 3 of his at-home isolation “Home Alone 3”, a designation that Andrew has some issues with. They also discuss Steve Inskeep’s NPR interview with Donald Trump, and they pay tribute to Cambodia's “Hero Rat” who recently passed away.

  • #3595 Unproblematic Colonizing

    Jan 11 2022

    TBTL Friendo Chris Hayes (also known for his work on MSNBC and the Why Is This Happening podcast) joins Luke and Andrew to geek out about the new Beatles documentary, Get Back. Plus, an anonymous listener finds a odoriferous way to get people to wear their masks properly.

  • #3594 Strong Brunswick Energy

    Jan 10 2022

    Luke gets some bummer news on his latest COVID test, but he’s planning on making the most of his downtime this week. Plus, after Bob Saget passed away this weekend, it seems that everyone can agree on one thing: He really was a hell of a good guy. 

  • #3593 If You CPAP, Say Pap

    Jan 07 2022

    Luke and Camaro Kev join the show from Las Vegas, where they plan on visiting the hottest Taco Bell nightclub in the world (once Kevin gets his CPAP working.) 

  • #3592 The Woody Woodpecker Cinematic Universe

    Jan 06 2022

    Luke and Andrew overcome great technological adversity to produce today’s episode of TBTL, in which they eventually discuss Luke’s ill-advised homemade Neti pot and Andrew’s misguided attempts to turn his studio into an Andy Warhol-like party room. 

  • No Point Conversion: The Empire Strikes Back Of Football Seasons

    Jan 05 2022

    Luke and Andrew look to the future of their favorite football teams after very disappointing seasons by the Seahawks and Browns. Will either team start next year with their current quarterbacks? They hope so.

  • #3591 Hug First, Ask Questions Later

    Jan 05 2022

    Luke and Andrew find themselves at opposite ends of a cultural divide in the ongoing “War On Oldies.” Plus, Luke learns about an ill-named mountain in Oregon that he thinks could, respectfully, use a rebranding.

  • #3590 Mole Call

    Jan 04 2022

    Luke had to embark on an Ocean's Eleven-esque heist in order to get an audio recording into the proper hands yesterday. Plus, a concerned hockey fan may have saved a coach’s life after spotting a dangerous looking mole from afar.

  • #3589 Early Stage Dystopia

    Jan 03 2022

    Luke and Andrew kick-off the new year by opening up a bunch of holiday cards from the Tens of Listeners and taking a couple of phone calls from old friends. They also discuss Don’t Look Up, the movie everyone seemed to be talking about over the winter break.

  • #3588 Luke And Andrew And The Bottlecap Mystery!

    Dec 31 2021

    Luke and Andrew end the year as they began it…by not getting to any of the topics they promised to cover. But they DO solve a couple of mysteries, including one involving some Burbank Family Drama going back decades.

  • #3587 We’ve All Made Some Mistakes In The Hat Department

    Dec 30 2021

    Some songs go “lalala”. Some songs go “nanana.” And that, my friends, is the basis of today’s TBTL Winter Game!

  • #3586 Have You Heard The Good News About Smeagol?

    Dec 29 2021

    Can Luke and Andrew tell if a quote came from the bible, Shakespeare, or Lord of the Rings? We’ll find out in today’s installment of the TBTL Winter Games!

  • #3585 United We Fall

    Dec 28 2021

    TBTL’s most famous BriTEN, Paul, challenges Luke and Andrew with a quiz about English slang. They also discuss one of Luke’s biggest crushes in pop music.

  • #3584 Hoisted By Our Owen Petard

    Dec 27 2021

    Luke and Andrew debate the best (and worst) moments of vacations. They also spend a remarkable amount of time talking about sports posters from the 1980s. And they take an online quiz based on Owen Wilson’s famous catch phrase: “Wow.” 

  • #3583 Nobody Out-Comedy’s The Luke

    Dec 24 2021

    Luke’s encounter in a Chicago pizza shop sends Andrew on a Winter Games quest that he did not expect. Then they test their ability to recognize Christmas songs played backwards via a quiz created by Listener Aryn.

  • #3582 Wes Is More

    Dec 23 2021

    We all know Luke loves his Wes Anderson films…but does he love them enough to pass listener Kelly’s trivia quiz? Plus, Andrew reminisces about the time he was “hollered at” for bringing a drink down to a pool in Hawaii.

  • #3581 Magna Cum Grody

    Dec 22 2021

    TBTL Friendo Jami in Mississippi challenges Luke and Andrew (and their poor stomachs) with a homemade quiz based on her grandma’s friend’s 1970s-era cookbook. 

  • #3580 A Matchbox Made In Heaven

    Dec 21 2021

    Day two of the TBTL Winter Games has Luke and Andrew taking a long, hard look at their relationship as they play a version of the Newlywed Game. (Also, Andrew talks about his toy cars a lot, which is super cool.) 

  • #3579 Close, But No Seagal

    Dec 20 2021

    Let the TBTL Winter Games begin! Luke and Andrew kick-off two weeks of special episodes with a quiz from listener Mike, who wants to test their knowledge of Steven Seagal film titles. They also kick around some theories about heaven.

  • #3578 Dem Bits

    Dec 17 2021

    Luke and Andrew discuss the story of a huge tip at a restaurant in Arkansas that ends up causing much more trouble than it was worth. They also relive the glory days of comedian Kat Williams causing havoc up and down the West Coast.

  • #3577 Blorn To Blurs

    Dec 16 2021

    Luke had a scare at the airport yesterday, while Andrew was having the time of his life in Seattle. Also, Andrew maaaayyy have accidentally bought his girlfriend drug paraphernalia for Christmas?

  • #3576 Somewhere Between Humiliation And Triumph

    Dec 15 2021

    Luke survived his icy water plunge this morning…at least long enough to tell us what happened. Plus, Jen “Flash” Andrews swings by the studio to talk about her adventures in foster parenting and why reboots like Sex AND The City are irresistible…but also probably a bad idea.

  • #3575 Ain’t No Laws When Your Hands Are Icy Claws

    Dec 14 2021

    Luke is one day away from his arctic swim in the San Francisco Bay, and he is petrified. Plus, can Peloton sue Sex AND The City over the use of their product in the TV show? Andrew is skeptical of the whole thing.

  • #3574 Scent Of A Pacino

    Dec 13 2021

    Luke saw some amazing art in Chicago this weekend….and he also saw some very not amazing art. Plus, a New Yorker profile of Succession actor Jeremy Strong has his colleagues jumping to his defense.

  • #3573 The Vax Of Life

    Dec 10 2021

    Andrew almost cried when he went to get a booster shot yesterday, but not for the reason you think. Plus, authorities are cracking down on cosmetic enhancements at the world’s foremost camel beauty pageant.

  • #3572 This Is Zit

    Dec 09 2021

    Andrew is excited to get his booster shot today, but isn’t sure if he should believe the warnings that it will knock him out tomorrow. Plus, Luke is in Chicago, at the scene of a very favorite TBTL moment in history.

  • #3571 Fay It Ain’t Go

    Dec 08 2021

    Luke, Andrew, and Genevieve join forces once again for another TBTL + After These Messages Power Podcast. They delight in some new commercials from JB Smoove and try to sort out a baffling pitch from their beloved Kristen Bell.

  • #3570 Instant Gobble’s Gonna Get You

    Dec 08 2021

    Luke and Andrew learn (with the help of the Washington Post) just how much havoc the Amazon Echo is wreaking for people named Alexa. Plus, Luke has some hot takes on the employer who laid off 900 workers after getting a huge influx of cash. 

  • No Point Conversion: Homer Run

    Dec 07 2021

    Luke and Andrew finally get to enjoy a fun Seahawks win, and they’re now confident Seattle won’t lose any more games this season because just shut up and let them have this.

  • #3569 Critical Splenda Theory

    Dec 07 2021

    It’s time for a rare TBTL After Dark! Luke swings by Andrew’s studio after a very long day to discuss an experience that may have changed who he fundamentally is as a person. Or not. Then Genevieve pops-in to help taste-test some Joe-Joe’s cookies and various kinds of milk.

  • Definitely Not A TBTL!

    Dec 06 2021

    Today’s real episode of TBTL will be recorded and published later tonight. In the meantime, Andrew checks-in to explain what’s going on and to share some emails and vmails from the Tens!

  • #3568 My Brother-In-Law From Another Mother-In-Law

    Dec 03 2021

    Luke and Andrew make plans to open up their own coffee shop…with a twist. Plus, listeners (many of them!) explain why it’s better to back a pickup truck into a parking space instead of driving straight in, making Andrew rethink his own parking practices.  (Today’s intro tape via friday.beers.tv on TikTok.)

  • #3567 Possible Power Pleats

    Dec 02 2021

    Luke and Andrew discuss The Flaming Lips while listening to Bush, because no one else will. They also discuss JAGs, LAX, Rob Gonkrowski’s acting career, Spotify’s year-end wraps, and their own bravery as podcast hosts.

  • #3566 Silver Supoons

    Dec 01 2021

    Luke needs Andrew’s advice on how to deal with two neighbor-related dilemmas, and Andrew’s the exact wrong guy to ask. Plus, TBTL’s #1 Brit-TEN weighs in on the story about a group of travelers who got stuck in a pub for three days with an Oasis cover band.

  • No Point Conversion: The Best Offense Is Having An Offense

    Nov 30 2021

    Luke and Andrew bemoan a couple of highly predictable and highly avoidable losses by their favorite football teams :( 

  • #3565 Zaba Dabba Doo

    Nov 30 2021

    Luke goes to very great lengths to watch the new Kenny G. documentary...and it’s worth it. Plus, listeners weigh-in on Luke’s family vaccine dilemma and the security camera outside his apartment door. 

  • #3564 If You Give A Goat Some Gabagool...

    Nov 29 2021

    Luke receives a text message during the show that places him smack-dab in a modern moral dilemma. Meanwhile, basketball star Giannis Antetenkupo loves Oreo cookies, but he JUST learned the proper way to eat them. 

  • #3563 Robes, Pierre!

    Nov 26 2021

    Luke realizes he is being surveilled in a way that seems innocent enough, but is pretty upsetting in reality. Plus, Andrew decides to scratch off 3 lotto tickets that he found in his desk drawer. Will he be a thousandaire by the end of the show?! Tune in to find out.

  • #3562 Running A Fowl

    Nov 25 2021

    On this special Thanksgiving episode of TBTL, Luke defends lumpy mashed potatoes and celebrates stuffing balls, while Andrew tries desperately to pass a holiday-related pop quiz. 

  • #3561 Take It Back To Grandma Town

    Nov 24 2021

    Andrew and Luke get ready for Thanksgiving by remembering the smell of their grandma’s cupboards and taking a COVID test, respectively. They also learn a fascinating detail about Pee-Wee’s Big Adventure as they say farewell to the man who played Crazy Larry. 

  • #3560 Don’t Windex My Brownies

    Nov 23 2021

    Luke and Andrew discuss their Thanksgiving plans while they also ponder the difference between pizza and cheesy bread with marinara sauce. Plus, an armored truck accidentally spilled money all over the freeway in San Diego, and now police say all the people who grabbed dollar bills have to give them back.

  • No Point Conversion: Boyler Alert

    Nov 22 2021

    Luke and Andrew try to make sense of the bewildering 3-7 Seahawks after another painful loss. They also discuss the state of Baker Mayfield, who looked terrible yesterday in an ugly Browns win over Detroit.

  • #3559 North Of Strangers, South Of Lovers

    Nov 22 2021

    Andrew is preparing for his first phase of Jury Duty later today, Luke is making plans to crash Andrew’s upcoming Hawaiian Vacation, and an Australian journalist finds himself in hot water for not listening to Adele’s latest release.

  • #3558 Vice President Of Trampoline-Related Dunking

    Nov 19 2021

    The original Philly Phanatic is back, and the Phill-In Phanatic isn’t too pleased about it. Plus, Luke and Andrew receive a very moving message from a listener who’s found an incredible use for the TBTL Sound Machine.

  • #3557 The Truth About Cops And Robbers

    Nov 18 2021

    Andrew has a VERY EXCITING update about the new TBTL SpaceHey community. Meanwhile, Luke is bracing himself for an upcoming movie about a radio journalist, which he knows is going to make him sob.

  • #3556 Ghost Duck Of Christmas Future

    Nov 17 2021

    A new report suggests that people should stop sucking-in their guts, because it’s not good for your health. This is really hitting Luke where it hurts. Plus, Andrew’s been chopping it up with listeners on the new MySpace site, and he’s lovin’ it.

  • #3555 What’s A Meta, You?

    Nov 16 2021

    MySpace is back, baby! Sort of! And Andrew is looking for friends. Plus, an interview with a 105 year old woman who just broke a record gets real honest real fast. 

  • #3554 Mike Check

    Nov 15 2021

    Luke and Andrew remember their friend and TBTL Legend Mike Frizzell, with some help from Jen “Flash” Andrews and Bill Radke, who knew him well.  Click here to donate to help Mike’s family or to bid on some classic TBTL merch to support the cause. 

  • #3553 Thumb And Thumber

    Nov 12 2021

    Luke goes knocking on doors in his new apartment building on a quest to find a spice. But are his new neighbors ready to meet him like this? He and Andrew also celebrate the 51st anniversary of Oregon’s famous whale explosion...and they find out it wasn’t the only one. 

  • #3552 Quid Pro No

    Nov 11 2021

    Luke and Andrew explore their differing personality types through a conversation about ranch dressing. They also discuss a couple of head-scratchy art projects that popped-up in the news this week, including the apparent destruction of an original Banksy work. 

  • #3551 You’re Boaring Me To Death

    Nov 10 2021

    Luke has a terrifying encounter just outside Pleasanton, California, which doesn’t sound like a place where you should have a terrifying encounter. Oh, and Paul Rudd is the Sexiest Man Alive according to People Magazine and Stephen Colbert.

  • #3550 Almond Milk Hotel

    Nov 09 2021

    Luke and Andrew are saddened by the death of actor Dean Stockwell, who apparently tried to leave show business behind more than once. They also hear about a man who says he paid off his student loans by eating exclusively at Six Flags for 7 years.

  • No Point Conversion: Discount Double-Check That Vax Card

    Nov 08 2021

    David From The Basement joins Luke and Andrew to discuss yesterday’s big Cleveland Browns win and what to expect when Russell Wilson returns to face Aaron “I’m Immunized” Rodgers next week.

  • #3549 Grouchy Or Pro-Fauci?

    Nov 08 2021

    Andrew is confused by a mask he saw someone wearing in public this weekend, and he wants to get to the bottom of it. Plus, Luke’s home renovation project is stirring up some complicated emotions.

  • #3548 Diners, Diners and Diners

    Nov 05 2021

    Luke swings by Andrew’s studio, where they throw open the phone lines and hear from listeners, including one caller who used frontier justice to teach an unruly kid a lesson in a movie theater. Plus, Andrew ordered some soup at a diner yesterday! And it was okay!

  • #3547 ASCII And You Shall Recievey

    Nov 04 2021

    Listeners help Luke and Andrew with some details about Emoji vs Emoticons. Plus, Merriam-Webster’s embrace of the word “Fluffernutter” inspires a very important conversation about peanut-butter-and-jelly sandwiches.

  • #3546 Parent Groups Just Don’t Understand

    Nov 03 2021

    A campaign to create a donkey emoji prompts Luke and Andrew to reminisce about their very earliest internet experiences. Plus, a journey through Luke’s new neighborhood puts him on the scene of a live TV news report.

  • #3545 Fry Another Day

    Nov 02 2021

    Luke is settling into his new apartment, but also maybe slightly electrocuting himself in the process. Plus, a controversial “mega dorm” project replaces windows with virtual windows, while Mark Zuckerberg promises to make everything virtual, eventually. Oh, hi, Mark!

  • No Point Conversion: The Wentz On The Bench

    Nov 01 2021

    Luke and Andrew are happy that the Seahawks absolutely dominated a game that they were supposed to dominate, but Andrew is still VERY sour about yesterday’s Browns loss and a Fantasy Football bad beat that he can’t fully believe.

  • #3544 Younger, Broker And More East Coaster

    Nov 01 2021

    Luke learned some important lessons while moving apartments this weekend, the main one being “never move apartments.” Plus, a very young listener offers a new inspirational theme song for TBTL and the Tens of Listeners.

  • #3543 Blurst Fiends

    Oct 29 2021

    Luke will be spending his Halloween weekend moving apartments, and he’s already wondering if he made a Terrible Mistake. Plus, Andrew recaps the top three horror films of all time with ten words or less. And PETA wants us to start referring to baseball bullpens as “Arm Barns.”

  • #3542 Excuse Our French Dispatch

    Oct 28 2021

    Luke has now seen the new Wes Anderson film, which puts he and Andrew on the cutting edge of pop culture criticism. Plus, BJ Novak uses Instagram to reveal why his face is used on weird products around the world.

  • #3541 You Love To Z It

    Oct 27 2021

    Forget “Bones or No Bones”, Luke and Andrew realize they’re playing a game called “Brains or No Brains” every time they turn on their mics. And today they have No Brains. They also get around to discussing the fascinating “Bad Art Friend” story that riled everyone up recently.

  • No Point Conversion: Keenum Was The Case That They Gave Me

    Oct 26 2021

    Luke and Andrew find their beloved Seahawks at 2-5 with another painful loss last night. They also try to remember way back to last Thursday’s Browns win over Denver.

  • #3540 A Frustration Of Nipping Birds

    Oct 26 2021

    Andrew receives a gift from a listener in an unusual way. Luke regrets buying chowder coffee at the airport. And listener Harper calls back to give some context to her recent misdemeanor.

  • #3539 Whatcha Dune Here?

    Oct 25 2021

    Luke and his friends ended up accidentally hacking the mainframe this weekend, raising a moral conundrum. Plus, it turns out we’re all just waiting to find out if we’re going to have a Bones Day or a No Bones Day.

  • #3538 Unfashionably Late

    Oct 22 2021

    Luke has an absolute NIGHTMARE of a morning in New York City with a story that has Andrew’s blood running cold. Plus, a plan to save a bunch of dogs using drones goes sideways when “The A-Team” shows up. (Today’s intro tape via Chris Fleming)

  • #3537 Slayed By The Bell

    Oct 21 2021

    Luke is in New York City, where he is recruiting new TBTL listeners one at a time. Plus, some research shows that ambulance sirens may cause more harm than good.

  • #3536 A Whirling Dervish Of Passwords

    Oct 20 2021

    Luke and Andrew realize at the last minute that they can open the phone lines and take calls from listeners. So they do! Plus, Luke is shocked to hear that Andrew had a college radio show. 

  • #3535 Start The Steal

    Oct 19 2021

    Luke swings by the studios of Walsh, Walsh And Doormat, which Andrew hopes smells okay for him. Plus, the highest-paid state employee in Washington just lost his job over a vaccination mandate. And a listener calls in with a fascinating story about breaking the law and getting caught.

  • No Point Conversion: Meme And Shout

    Oct 18 2021

    Luke and Andrew lick their wounds after a couple of devastating losses for their beloved football teams this weekend.

  • #3534 I Hate A Swole Zonkey

    Oct 18 2021

    Luke and Andrew discuss the rules of self-checkout kiosks at the grocery store and why Andrew is now on the wrong side of the law. Plus, a pack of zebra are on the loose in Maryland, and one zealous TV reporter thinks this is the story that will make him famous.

  • #3533 If You Can’t Tweet Them, Join Them

    Oct 15 2021

    Andrew confesses to some embarrassing Twitter-related action this morning. Luke can relate. Plus, why you should never ask to see the chef at a restaurant, and other TBTL advice. 

  • #3532 The Bus Stops Here

    Oct 14 2021

    Luke and Andrew discover “the worst video game ever created,” which leads Andrew to a new obsession. Plus, is Stephen King out here just making up words like “orlesque”?

  • #3531 God Don’t Make No Junkets

    Oct 13 2021

    Luke’s interview with a film director suffers some technical setbacks. Meanwhile, Andrew accidentally put on his Good Socks today, even though he didn’t need to. And “Power Out Linda” sets the record straight regarding her role on TBTL. 

  • #3530 Not All Heroes Eat Grapes

    Oct 12 2021

    Luke and Andrew are surprised to learn that a sixth iteration of Home Alone is coming to theaters, and that it features some of their favorite comedians. Plus, Paul McCartney continues to make headlines, this time by negging the Rolling Stones.

  • No Point Conversion: Clipboard Theo

    Oct 11 2021

    Luke and Andrew brace for the future after the Seahawks lost their game...and their quarterback. And the Browns suffer a painful, high-scoring loss to Justin Herbert’s L.A. Chargers. 

  • #3529 Don’t Praise The Portal, And Don’t Condone The Throne!

    Oct 11 2021

    Luke stumbled on one of the weirdest, most fascinating stories about a rock band that he’s ever heard. It involves “Fake Zombies.” Plus, Paul McCartney says he didn’t break up The Beatles. 

  • #3528 Chekhov's Cheesesteak

    Oct 08 2021

    A San Francisco sandwich shop is eliciting a lot of confusion with its latest commercial. Plus, Luke blew out his voice again last night, and Andrew’s excited to see 4 Non-Blondes back in the headlines.

  • #3527 And You Don’t Believe In A Content God?

    Oct 07 2021

    Andrew has jumped head-first into the surveillance game, and it’s paying off. Sort of. Plus, Luke’s awkward exchange in an elevator forces him to adopt a British accent from this day forward.

  • #3526 Wednesdays Are For The Walshes

    Oct 06 2021

    William Shatner is going to space, but he’s still a jerk. And the results of this year’s Fat Bear contest creates an uproar. And listener Dave mark’s this year’s Trucktober festivities with a special poem.

  • #3525 Didn’t Know You Liked To Get Not Dry Though

    Oct 05 2021

    Andrew’s adventures in plumbing go predictably sideways. Plus, Facebook, Instagram, and all their related products shut down for most of yesterday. Maybe that’s a good thing?

  • No Point Conversion: There’s Crying In Baseball!

    Oct 04 2021

    Luke and Andrew say goodbye to a magical Mariner’s season, and they recap this weekend’s wins by the Seahawks and Browns (Sorry, Stu.)

  • #3524 Oh, Henry's!

    Oct 04 2021

    Luke destroyed his voice this weekend rooting for his Seattle Mariners. But that doesn’t stop a podcaster! Also, farewell Ozy Media, we hardly knew thee. 

  • #3523 A Loaded Sack Of Moose Face

    Oct 01 2021

    Luke’s travelling up to Seattle this weekend to drink in that sweet Mariners playoff race energy. Plus, Netflix’s new, wildly popular offering “Squid Game” is creating issues for a fellow who’s phone number is used in the show.

  • #3522 Brother Can You Spare A BOGO?

    Sep 30 2021

    Andrew receives a surprise email at the beginning of today’s show. Plus, Mick Jagger chills at a little bar in North Carolina, and it’s kind of charming as hell. 

  • #3521 Ducks And Cover

    Sep 29 2021

    Luke and Andrew realize that they’ve been missing a BIG DETAIL in their ongoing Duck Painting Coverage. Plus, a Danish artist pockets a bunch of government cash and calls it art. And Eminem is opening a restaurant called “Mom’s Spaghetti.”

  • No Point Conversion: First, Cousins...

    Sep 28 2021

    Luke and Andrew try to make sense of the Seahawks’ 1-2 start after a loss to the Vikings. Meanwhile, the Cleveland defense almost murdered Chicago’s rookie QB. And the Mariners continue to keep it interesting, with only 5 games left to play.

  • #3520 Duck Tales

    Sep 28 2021

    Luke and Andrew get an update on a mysterious duck painting, as well as a 40 million dollar conference call gone awry. Plus, a listener calls in with a story about getting a too-good-to-be-true deal on a kitchen appliance.

  • #3519 Opossumable Burgers

    Sep 27 2021

    Luke is giving up coffee, at least for a week. Also, Alabama’s leading boudoir photographer and barrel racer is upset that the state has confiscated his opossum named Donovan.

  • #3518 Sea-Tac Is For Lovers

    Sep 24 2021

    Luke stepped on a meatball, and then had a weird experience at the doctor’s office. These are unrelated events.

  • #3517 Brewster’s Oranges

    Sep 23 2021

    Luke and Andrew go through the audio archives and play some long-forgotten TBTL intro tape. Plus, a YA author admits to compulsively sending made-up stories to Slate's advice columnist.

  • #3516 There Are No Trevors In ZZ Top

    Sep 22 2021

    Andrew realizes he may need to see a men’s health specialist before he can perform his duties at an upcoming wedding. Plus, Demi Adejuyigbe released his final (?) “September” video yesterday. And listeners share tales of dog poop vengeance gone wrong and chefs taking ostentatiously long bathroom breaks.

  • #3515 The Buc-ee’s Stops Here

    Sep 21 2021

    Luke spent the morning wearing a cowboy hat and yelling at the top of his lungs for a TV story. Meanwhile, MSNBC’s Chris Hayes becomes TBTL’s promotions department. 

  • No Point Conversion: Titan-ic

    Sep 20 2021

    Luke and Andrew discuss the Seahawks’ somewhat baffling loss to Tennessee yesterday and the Browns’ ugly win over Houston. 

  • #3514 Somewhere Between Archie and Nietzsche

    Sep 20 2021

    Luke joins the show from Texas, where he endured a boat tour guide whose sense of humor was...confusing at best. Plus, Gillian Anderson is asked an awkward question after her big Emmy win last night, but she handled it with aplomb.

  • #3513 Whiffs Of Winkler

    Sep 17 2021

    A surprise attendee at the trial of the year reminds Luke and Andrew of Lucille Bluth. Or maybe George Bluth? Or is he more like Steve Buscemi in 30 Rock? We’ll figure it out. Plus, plant burglars are swiping valuable bonsai trees across the Twin Cities, and it’s kind of heartbreaking

  • #3512 The Brown Mile

    Sep 16 2021

    The people of Trinidad are not happy with Nicki Minaj’s controversial claims about “her cousin’s friend” who supposedly experienced unusually personal side-effects of the COVID vaccine shot. 

  • #3511 Luke's Strong Grandpa Energy

    Sep 15 2021

    Luke and Andrew remember comedian Norm MacDonald, who died much too soon. And an anonymous listener describes how they were taken-in by the same exact printer/toner scam that we talked about last week.

  • #3510 You’ve Got Newsletter

    Sep 14 2021

    Luke and Andrew call-up Kiki Lolo, who has a big personal announcement to make (and some RomComs to recommend.) Plus, Nicki Minaj riles the internet with an anti-vax tweet that is...dubious at best.

  • No Point Conversion: Some Offense

    Sep 13 2021

    The Seahawks and the Browns both looked very good in their season openers yesterday. Sadly, only one of them won. It’s okay, though. It’s going to be okay. 

  • #3509 Divide and Concur

    Sep 13 2021

    Luke spent the morning wrestling with some cockamamie app with a terrible name in order to attend a virtual conference. Speaking of meeting software, some people are developing “Zoom Dysmorphia” after seeing themselves on their own computer screens all day. Also, Andrew drops the ball on several jokes, not unlike Nick Chubb in yesterday’s Browns game, which we WILL NOT talk about.

  • #3508 Jeepers Creepers, Where Did You Get Those Facebook Peepers?

    Sep 10 2021

    Luke and Andrew face off in classic talk radio fashion over the new Ray-Ban sunglasses with cameras built into them. Plus, the sirens outside Luke’s window may be seriously impacting his broadcasting career.

  • #3507 The Buzzy End Of The Lollipop

    Sep 09 2021

    Luke and Andrew listen to the Top Ten Happiest Songs Of All Time...as determined by neuroscientists.

  • #3506 Inking Outside The Box

    Sep 08 2021

    The law finally caught up with a man who’d been running an overpriced printer cartridge scam for decades. And Luke and Andrew try to unlock the mysterious pricing schemes at a mall department store.

  • #3505 Braiding On A Curve

    Sep 07 2021

    Andrew has some exciting new ideas for network TV shows, including “The Piano Man” and “The Pickle Jar Guy.” He and Luke also pay homage to actor Mickael K. Williams, who died this weekend. Plus, in Top Stories: Music Edition, Guns ‘n’ Roses get the power pulled on them, ABBA is reuniting digitally (?), and Lil Uzi Vert’s 24 million dollar diamond got ripped out of his forehead while crowd surfing (maybe).

  • #3504 Suit Yourself

    Sep 06 2021

    Luke helps Andrew prepare for an upcoming wedding with some fashion and shopping advice. Plus, a listener is forced to do something nice at a drive-through window, and she is not happy about it.

  • #3503 Our Collective Uncle

    Sep 03 2021

    Andrew goes on an emotional roller coaster ride with a traffic cop in Bellevue, Washington, while Luke walks a very thin negotiating tightrope with REI. Plus, we finally know what McDonalds’ Grimace character is supposed to be. Or do we?

  • #3502 I’m Not A Cyclist, I Just Pedal A Lot

    Sep 02 2021

    Luke is still in Portland, instead of Philadelphia, where he was supposed to be interviewing some iconic sports mascots. He explains the lawsuit that kept him home. Plus, the tennis player who keeps taking long bathroom breaks finally gets booed after pulling his stunt again. And a woman is in jail after trying to pass a fake vaccine card with a dumb spelling error. 

  • #3501 Grand Theft Go-Kart

    Sep 01 2021

    Luke survived a cinematic action scene while trying to cross a bridge this morning. Plus, someone stole a dozen go-karts from Luke and Andrew’s favorite family fun spot. And a “fake” high school scams its way onto ESPN. 

  • #3500 Dr. Hulkamaniac’s Monster

    Aug 31 2021

    David From The Basement is here to crown this year’s official TBTL Song Of The Summer! Plus, listeners weigh-in on the great Dog Poop Debate of 2021. And a competitor at the French Open is accused of using bathroom breaks to cheat. 

  • #3499 Fair Shakes

    Aug 30 2021

    Luke found himself a little more nervous than expected at the Oregon State Fair this weekend, while Andrew had a pretty big scare of his own at home. Plus, Heggies Pizza just blew Luke’s mind with  a tiny bit of frozen pizza advice.

  • #3498 Naving At My Gazel

    Aug 27 2021

    Luke and Andrew find themselves slightly obsessed with the Milk Crate Challenge and with a new Steve Harvey project. Plus, a kind stranger saves the day for Luke and his Covid vax card.

  • #3497 Krampus Must Have Come Eaaarrrly!

    Aug 26 2021

    Andrew discovers that he might have been on the same football team as a now-famous NFL coach...who might have soaped his locker. Meanwhile, Luke is in a very hidden valley, tracking down the roots of ranch dressing…

  • #3496 From S.H.A.G.s To Riches

    Aug 25 2021

    Luke is on assignment in California, learning some fascinating things about search and rescue dogs! Plus, Andrew has some serious questions about a Seattle-area retirement community. 

  • #3495 Top Gum

    Aug 24 2021

    Luke and Andrew discuss their afternoon snacks, bad breath, and their own bad gum-chewing etiquette. They also talk about the somewhat troubling “click-bait-ification” of Netflix tiles.

  • #3494 I Fought The Law And The Dog Won

    Aug 23 2021

    Luke’s day in traffic court almost hit a big snag, but then his dog Rudy saved the day. Plus, the Washington Post offers some good advice on how to remember people’s names.

  • #3493 Oh, The Shane

    Aug 20 2021

    Andrew bought himself a Battery Daddy, and there ain’t nothing wrong with that. But the slightly bigger news is that the new, self-selected host of Jeopardy! is already stepping down in disgrace, and the world is rejoicing.  Today’s opening tape comes from Cassie Workman (@GhostCassie on TikTok)

  • #3492 Voight Where Prohibited

    Aug 19 2021

    Luke finds himself in traffic court, while Andrew finally beats The Oregon Trail game. Plus, a reporter for The Ringer discovers many more reasons why the new host of Jeopardy! was a bad pick...including the fact that he received almost $300K in PPP loans while he was employed as an executive producer. 

  • #3491 Honey I Shrunk The Couch

    Aug 18 2021

    Luke wandered around the remains of an old dry cleaners yesterday, looking for the clothes he’d left with them when they were still in business. Meanwhile, Andrew has some new CNN documentaries to putter around with. And an expert offers advice on how to properly engage in small talk. 

  • #3490 The Devil’s Swab

    Aug 17 2021

    Luke got two Covid tests yesterday, and it was quite the afternoon! Plus, David From The Basement swings by to announce the TWO remaining finalists for this year’s TBTL Song Of The Summer!

  • #3489 Hey Gorgle, Take Me To Nortflorx

    Aug 16 2021

    Luke and Andrew geek out over “Nestflix,” a website showcasing the fake movies and TV shows nested inside real movies and TV shows. 

  • #3488 Gallagher’s Hammer

    Aug 13 2021

    Luke is headed off to a remote cabin in the woods (without electricity) for one of the hottest weekends of the summer. Plus, Andrew is very excited that some classic De La Soul records are about to be available via streaming services.

  • #3487 You’ve Got MEL

    Aug 12 2021

    A lot happens on today’s show, but the important thing to know is that Andrew stumbles on a private investigator’s website that lists all the ways swingers secretly let other swingers know that they are swingers...one of which is “garden gnomes.”

  • #3486 A Cymbal Plan

    Aug 11 2021

    Luke and Andrew react to the breaking news that Jeopardy! has officially announced its new hosts. Plural. Plus, Luke had a magical night at the Hollywood Bowl. And Seattle locals set Andrew straight about Bartell Drugs. 

  • #3485 From Busk Till Yawn

    Aug 10 2021

    Luke discovers that a Los Angeles landmark very close to his heart disappeared, seemingly overnight.

  • #3484 A Boloney Comb?

    Aug 09 2021

    Luke almost ruined an international business deal in Los Angeles, and Andrew has some serious questions for buskers in Seattle. Plus, Andrew’s ancient cat is now making trouble for other families, too. 

  • #3483 Bodok Steaks

    Aug 06 2021

    Luke and Andrew are gearing up for their respective outdoor adventures this weekend...just in time for the first real rain of the summer. Plus, more details are emerging about the supposed new host of Jeopardy!, and they aren’t great. 

  • #3482 Who OSHAs the OSHA?

    Aug 05 2021

    Luke blocks Andrew on Twitter. It’s a whole thing. Plus, Jeopardy! may have chosen its new host and -- if they have -- a lot of people aren’t happy with the pick. 

  • #3481 Burbsketball

    Aug 04 2021

    Day 2 of Luke’s new workout routine has him worried that he might have broken gym etiquette. Plus, Australian birds are teaching each other how to open garbage bins, and it’s the end of an era for a classic Pacific NW beer.

  • #3480 Ya Been Stinkin’ Up My Sweaters!

    Aug 03 2021

    David From The Basement swings by the studio to reveal the final four contenders for this year’s TBTL Song of the Summer and to discuss some VERY BIG Lord of the Rings news. 

  • #3479 A Swimple Plan

    Aug 02 2021

    Luke is back with all kinds of stories from his summer break. Also, Andrew might have caught a very important home run ball in a parallel universe.

  • #3478 Happy Trailers To You!

    Jul 30 2021

    Luke and Andrew close out the 2021 TBTL Summer Games with more of the Movie Trailer Challenge!

  • #3477 And Other Topical Things, Too!

    Jul 29 2021

    Luke and Andrew try to stump each other with some hand-picked movie trailers for a game that Listener J-Dog (how did he get that name?) invented in a parking lot.

  • #3476 Doobie Trap!

    Jul 28 2021

    Marissa in Maryland is back with another Michael McDonald challenge for Luke!

  • #3475 Bin There, Done That

    Jul 27 2021

    Listener Kevin takes the TBTL Summer Games in a trashy direction with a homemade quiz about garbage containers. Plus, Andrew gets to know his x-ray technician in a way he never expected.

  • #3474 8-Bit Buds

    Jul 26 2021

    The Summer Games continue with a challenge from one of TBTL’s youngest listeners, who just might be the daughter of Luke’s insurance agent. Can Luke recognize the 8-bit cover versions of pop songs? 

  • #3473 Homer Is Where The Heart Is

    Jul 23 2021

    A very special listener writes-in to challenge Luke’s knowledge of The Simpsons as we close-out the first week of the TBTL Summer Games!

  • #3472 Schadenfreudian Slip

    Jul 22 2021

    Luke talks about the time he made a motorcycle crash with his mind! All that and more is revealed on this Day 4 of the 2021 TBTL Summer Games!

  • #3471 Petty In Pink

    Jul 21 2021

    Just how petty can Luke and Andrew get? A quiz sent-in by Jami in Mississippi should clear that up on day 3 of the 2021 TBTL Summer Games!

  • #3470 Imaginary Friends Of Imaginary Friends

    Jul 20 2021

    Jake from Chicago (AKA “The Perfect Daddy”) tests Luke and Andrew’s knowledge of their favorite podcasts in Day 2 of the TBTL Summer Games!

  • #3469 Age Is Just A Cucumber

    Jul 19 2021

    Luke and Andrew find out how old they really are based on the foods they love and hate. Welcome to the 2021 TBTL Summer Games!

  • #3468 An Embarrassment Of Ians

    Jul 16 2021

    David From The Basement swings by to reveal the first round winners of the TBTL Song Of The Summer contest!

  • #3467 Let Me GabaGoogle That

    Jul 15 2021

    Luke stumbles on the best cassette tape ever produced, and Andrew has a new TBTL slogan that is...upsetting. Plus, listeners weigh-in on garbage cams, buried teeth, and disgusting encounters with gum.

  • #3466 Fart Blanche

    Jul 14 2021

    Luke and Andrew help their famous friend, Chris, with a rhetorical dilemma. But they thrill two birds with one scone by also discussing the goldfish that are getting HUGE in Minnesota waters.

  • #3465 Four On The Snore

    Jul 13 2021

    Luke recorded himself snoring last night. Want to hear it? Plus, a Michigan man found 160 bowling balls buried under his house, and that’s not even the best part of the story!

  • #3464 Draw Me Like One Of Your French Recluses

    Jul 12 2021

    Richard Branson sort of went to space, and we sort of don’t care. But we’re definitely not calling him “Sir”. Plus, a heated baseball rivalry has one team taking off jerseys and another team layering up under the Houston sun. 

  • #3463 A Squeeze Machine For My Brain

    Jul 09 2021

    Luke realizes he has sleep apnea, so he and Andrew practice snoring exercises. Plus, an oral history of food expiration dates and an oral history of Ringo Starr being kind of annoying. 

  • #3462 Hogan’s Zeros

    Jul 08 2021

    Luke discovers some vintage audio from the 1990s that is very specific to his interests. Plus, some Rowdy Boston Teens prevent a flight from taking off and ruin people’s vacations. And a new study says people (like Luke) are spending an astonishing amount of time on TikTok.

  • #3461 I Think You Should Stay

    Jul 07 2021

    Luke is worried about the welders working on the construction project outside his window, while Andrew’s worried he’ll never get around to buying a new water bottle. Meanwhile, the CDC is taking Twitter heat for creating a somewhat graphic graphic aimed at keeping poo out of pools. 

  • #3460 Bonfire Of The Vanity Plates

    Jul 06 2021

    Luke is VERY EXCITED about the return of the show I Think You Should Leave with Tim Robinson...so excited that he accidentally threw one of his most beloved possessions out of his 2-story window. Plus, a woman in Maine has a license plate that is irritating the Powers That Be.

  • #3459 Boom City Boyz

    Jul 05 2021

    Luke and Andrew report back after their holiday weekend at an establishment known as “Boom City.”

  • #3458 Shut Up, Little Wizard!

    Jul 02 2021

    David from the Basement swings by the Nest Broadcast center to announce the 16 finalists for the 2021 TBTL Song of the Summer! (And to talk a little bit about Lord of the Rings, of course.) 

  • #3457 Piven On A Prayer

    Jul 01 2021

    Jeremy Piven has a new podcast coming out. Luke and Andrew sample the trailer he released. They also talk a lot about sex education for some reason, and they discuss a fascinating story about people trying to recycle bowling balls.

  • #3456 The Tip Of The Iceblurgh

    Jun 30 2021

    Luke gets a new kitchen appliance that is exciting and mildly terrifying, while Andrew considers a trip to the Minnesota State Fair to eat various styles of fried dough.

  • #3455 It’s Randy O’Clock Somewhere

    Jun 29 2021

    Luke is back, babyyyyy! But his weekend plans didn’t go exactly as expected. He checks-in with Andrew on surviving the PNW heat dome, and they discuss the nude Australian sunbathers who were scared by a deer and are now in trouble for violating COVID rules or something?

  • #3454 Strong Like Vieves

    Jun 28 2021

    Genevieve (aka “The Longest Running Co-Bro Of Andrew’s Life”) swings by the sweltering studio to talk about how she is surviving the PNW heatwave and about Andrew’s not-so-subtle plan to move into his doctor’s waiting room to beat the heat.

  • #3453 He’s Got VPNs On His VPNs

    Jun 25 2021

    Luke is bracing for this weekend’s intense heat wave while Andrew is not taking it seriously enough. Plus, a mysterious elephant migration is fascinating China, people are getting worse at The Price Is Right, and why ketchup bottles are biased against hot dogs.

  • #3452 Old Goals In New Goal Skins

    Jun 24 2021

    Turns out, Luke’s mispronunciation of a reporter’s name might have been the best thing to happen to TBTL in weeks. Plus, a British man breaks the record for M&M stacking (but there’s a twist!), and Luke was very, very right about something, according to the Tens of listeners. 

  • The Fightin’ McGlory Brothers!

    Jun 23 2021

    The New York TImes uses DNA tests to try to determine if Subway tuna sandwiches actually contain tuna...but the headlines don’t tell the full story. Plus, Paul Rudd takes one last shot at fooling Conan O’Brien with his Mac and Me gag.

  • #3450 Hot Chad Summer

    Jun 22 2021

    Andrew is officially a White Claw guy now. So, watch out, world. Plus, it turns out that people really, really, really dislike Jeff Bezos. And defensive lineman Carl Nassib becomes the first NFL player to come out as gay. 

  • #3449 Grimli The Pleasant

    Jun 21 2021

    Andrew comes into the show with some “hot slime energy”, while Luke grapples with some travel regrets. Plus, a national chicken wing shortage has restaurants scrambling, and a mistake by an HBO intern gets everyone talking about their most embarrassing workplace moments. 

  • #3448 Hooked On Hooked On Phonics Jokes

    Jun 18 2021

    Luke has some intense experiences trying to eat sushi in Portland. Plus, a guy has to spend 24 hours in a Waffle House after losing a bet, but it seems like he’s being a little extra about it. And turns out, Peter Falk had to help quell a Columbo-related uprising in Romania.

  • #3447 Ernest Saves Congress

    Jun 17 2021

    Andrew comes in hot with a story about the law making process in Washington State, forever changing the editorial direction of TBTL 🔥🔥🔥. Plus, Luke encounters his nemesis on his jog again. And today is the 75th anniversary of the very first mobile phone call.

  • #3446 Life And Love And Whatnot

    Jun 16 2021

    Andrew has a question about strip clubs that he doesn’t really want answered. Plus, he and Luke recall the awful times in their lives when they slept through their alarms and found themselves late for work. And crayfish are doing stupid things after getting high off the antidepressants that humans are peeing out. 

  • #3445 Negligible Poundage

    Jun 15 2021

    An 84 year old farmer finds himself an unlikely ASMR YouTube star, even though he doesn’t really know what YouTube is. Plus, science can explain why you probably hate the sound of your own voice.

  • #3444 Andrew’s Reverse Bucket List

    Jun 14 2021

    NBC shuts down its “Ultimate Slip & Slide” show due to an “explosive diarrhea outbreak” that sounds like an “absolute nightmare.” Plus, Jeff Bezos’ plan to “travel to space” leaves Luke “wanting more.”

  • #3443 Honky Tonk Binaca Donk

    Jun 11 2021

    Luke and Andrew continue to burn-up the podcast charts with a lengthy conversation about toothpicks and dental floss. Plus, an important update on Luke’s formerly favorite tweet, and Jeffrey Toobin takes to the airwaves again, for better or worse.

  • #3442 Love Me Tendie

    Jun 10 2021

    Luke has scribbled down so many things he wants to talk about today, his show sheet “looks like Post Malone’s face.” First on the docket? The best tweet ever tweeted by a truck stop.

  • #3441 Boomer Goes The Dynamite

    Jun 09 2021

    Luke and Andrew keep TBTL young and hip today with some fresh conversations about Happy Days, Laverne & Shirley, and Mama’s Family. Plus, the FBI’s scheme to take down an international cartel is the stuff of movies.

  • #3440 Heaven Yelps Those Who Yelp Themselves

    Jun 08 2021

    A fascinating article in the New Yorker has Luke contemplating getting a robot cat as a pet. Plus, the reviews are in: TBTL apparently has a Yelp page?

  • #3439 Bo Don’t Know Middle Age

    Jun 07 2021

    Andrew is gearing up for a big scary day at the finger doctor’s office, and Luke is sorting out his feelings about Bo Burnham’s groundbreaking Netflix special. Plus, Luke stumbles on an astounding story from 2018 that Andrew thinks they’ve talked about before.

  • #3438 Better Than Bunk

    Jun 04 2021

    Airlines may have to stop serving booze on flights since passengers are getting so rowdy. And Luke and Andrew are surprisingly okay with that.

  • #3437 Flaunting My Flouting

    Jun 03 2021

    Luke and Andrew dive deep into their feelings after Andrew returns to his gym for the first time since the pandemic and Luke meets some Buff Dads. Plus, a heroic Spanish teenager digs his own hangout cave after getting into an argument with his parents.

  • #3436 Snatching Ls From The Jaws Of Ws

    Jun 02 2021

    Andrew purchased an item yesterday that no reasonable person has purchased since 2002, and he’s excited for it to arrive. Plus, the coolest teen in California fights a bear to protect her dogs.

  • #3435 A Godly Vegetable

    Jun 01 2021

    Luke is a little worried that he was too rude to his apartment property managers online, and Andrew has to visit “the bowels of hell” to retrieve a mysterious package. Plus, it would appear that movie-going audiences are ready to hit theaters again, possibly without masks. 

  • #3434 Aye, Concur

    May 31 2021

    Luke and Andrew make it back home after their TBTL-a-Thon adventures, but their travels did not go exactly as planned. 

  • #3433 ...It Was The Blurst Of Times

    May 28 2021

    Luke, Andrew and Kiki Lolo’s TBTL-a-Thon adventure hits a snag when their ‘93 Mitsubishi Delica breaks down in the desert at a place called “The Middle of Nowhere”. BUT, they do eventually make it to Phoenix to record today’s episode in front of Mary The TBTL Virgin. 

  • #3432 Non-Fungible Turtles

    May 27 2021

    Luke, Andrew and Kiki Lolo arrive in Oceanside, CA, to record today’s show outside Listener Lisa’s condo. Kiki celebrates her first visit to a restaurant in 14 months at a place called “The Junkyard.” Meanwhile, Luke and Andrew try to figure out what the heck the fourth dimension is. 

  • #3431 Sacramento Got Sunshine!

    May 26 2021

    Luke and Andrew arrive at listener Meghan’s front lawn in Sacramento after a night of speed walking many miles through her neighborhood. Plus, never let a cicada pee on your head and tell you it’s raining.

  • #3430 That’s Fortuna, Bro!

    May 25 2021

    Luke and Andrew make it to Humboldt County, where Luke goes on an emotional jog through the streets of his early childhood. Then they crash listener Adam’s house and record a podcast in his driveway.

  • #3429 A Sign Of The Crimes

    May 24 2021

    Luke and Andrew have a critical piece of equipment stolen moments after hitting the road for the big TBTL-a-Thon. But that doesn’t stop them from kicking things off the right way...from a driveway in Corvallis, OR! 

  • #3428 Elon Musty

    May 21 2021

    Luke and Andrew are VERY excited about this year’s TBTL-a-Thon gifts and can’t stop playing with them on the air. Plus, the CDC takes time out of its busy day to tell people to stop kissing chickens. 

  • #3427 Unfrozen Hot Dog Lawyer

    May 20 2021

    Andrew is very anxious as he awaits a VERY IMPORTANT PACKAGE related to next week’s live stream of TBTL. Plus, William Shatner gets an infuriating puff-piece in The Guardian. And another stranger reaches out to Andrew via Instagram looking for a different Andrew Walsh.

  • #3426 The Case Of Luke v. His Feelings

    May 19 2021

    Luke and Andrew learn that some of the 17-year cicadas are high on drugs and literally partying their butts off. 

  • #3425 American Splenda

    May 18 2021

    Luke and Andrew check their anxiety levels as they prepare for next week’s big road trip. Plus, Luke has another epic adventure involving a cup of coffee and a less-than-ideal sugar substitute. 

  • #3424 The Swordsman Of Slander

    May 17 2021

    Luke and Andrew announce their big, weird plans for this year’s TBTL-a-Thon adventure, which kicks-off next week! Plus, everything you thought you knew about the unlikely inventor of Flamin’ Hot Cheetos turns out to be a big, fat lie! *insert unicorn brain explode emoji*

  • #3423 And You Don’t Believe In A Therapist?

    May 14 2021

    Luke and Andrew try to wrap their minds around the new guidelines around wearing (or not wearing) facemasks in public. They also try to wrap their minds around a lot of other things. 

  • #3422 Mega Cremin Coins!

    May 13 2021

    Luke and Andrew stumble on tape of Vin Scully talking about the history of beards during a Dodger’s broadcast, and it is...special. Plus, a woman is in trouble for pulling a Steve Buschemi and pretending to be a high school student, complete with baseball hat and skateboard.

  • #3421 You Can Run But You Can’t Slide

    May 12 2021

    An old scientific theory that humans can only have up to 150 friends is coming under fire, and the original theorist is NOT HAVING IT!

  • #3420 Are You Disrespecting My Hydration Operation?

    May 11 2021

    Luke almost wet his pants in the elevator yesterday. But aside from that, his all-water diet seems to be going great. Plus, it turns out holograms really are the future, and the future is now.

  • #3419 Get Off My Prawn!

    May 10 2021

    Andrew stumbles on a strange coincidence when he decides to dig deep into some random NPR archives. And Luke has a new project that is making him pee constantly. Also, congrats to all of us for not getting hit by space debris this weekend!

  • #3418 Et Tu, Shapiro?

    May 07 2021

    One of Luke’s most famous NPR stories is celebrated by the network during their 50th anniversary celebration...only the folks at NPR left one important detail out. Andrew wants to sue. Oh, and a Japanese town spends its COVID relief money on a giant squid statue, and a little kid accidentally orders $2700 worth of Spongebob popsicles from Amazon.

  • #3417 Oh, How The Blurs Has Turned!

    May 06 2021

    Luke is forced to celebrate “Cinco de Luko”, whether he wants to or not. Plus, a trend piece about forgoing showers during the pandemic gives Andrew a lot to think -- and gripe -- about.

  • #3416 Nothing Gold Can Sag

    May 05 2021

    Luke and Andrew are charmed by a Will Smith Instagram post, until Andrew ruins it with more information. Plus, they FINALLY celebrate the 50 year and 2 day anniversary of NPR.

  • #3415 Good Boy Gets A Good Bell

    May 04 2021

    Andrew is secretly googling Luke’s dinner reservations in rural Oregon, which comes as a surprise to Luke and the listeners, who tuned in to hear the guys’ thoughts on NPR turning 50 years and one day.

  • #3414 Goodbye Yellow Brark Road

    May 03 2021

    Andrew discovered who he really is after the doctors sedated him for his hand surgery on Friday. And a fascinating explainer about the science of candles leads Luke to realize he’s got some minor beef with an Elton John song.

  • #3413: Alice In Chainsaws

    Apr 30 2021

    Andrew comes up with an experiment to see if Instagram is listening in on his conversations. Meanwhile Luke debuts a new character, "Rodney Dangerfield Talking About His Roomba."

  • #3412 Wint Wint

    Apr 29 2021

    Luke and Andrew celebrate some of their favorite weirdos on Twitter and some of their favorite TV teachers (Otis Drexell, we’re looking at you.) Plus, a researcher discovered some of the oldest water in the world, and it doesn’t smell very good.

  • #3411 Prickling My Pears

    Apr 28 2021

    Luke realizes he might have paid over a thousand dollars for some Costco scallops. And he learned that on Ed Balls Day, of all days.

  • #3410 Cannes Do Attitude

    Apr 27 2021

    Andrew gets some not-so-great news about his broken finger, but he and Luke get some good news about the “chihuahua from hell” who was looking for a home. Plus, Luke responds to fans who insist he release “The Burbank Cut” of his decade-old documentary film.  

  • #3409 Coffee Is For Glenn Closers

    Apr 26 2021

    Luke offers a long-awaited apology to David Blaine. Also, Glenn Close’s Oscar Night moment was great...but the media should probably acknowledge that it was scripted, right?

  • #3408 Honey I Shrunk The Capo

    Apr 23 2021

    Luke and Andrew pay tribute to Shock G of the Digital Underground, and Luke realizes that the sequel to Goodfellas has been hiding in plain sight.

  • #3407 The Windemere Beneath My Wings

    Apr 22 2021

    Luke and Andrew ponder the future of paying for goods and services with their palm prints, and they bid a fond farewell to humor...which they just killed many times over.

  • #3406 Wild Hogs Can’t Be Broken

    Apr 21 2021

    Luke and Andrew grow one step closer to merging into one single person after Luke sends out a confusing tweet. And the Washington Football Team floats some new possible names, most of which sound like John Travolta films.

  • #3405 Andrew’s Bad Trip

    Apr 20 2021

    Andrew spent yesterday trying not to pass out on the bus with a broken finger. Meanwhile, Luke is frustrated that his recent haircut took only 2 minutes. 

  • #3404 Now Voles I Can Get Into!

    Apr 19 2021

    Luke and Andrew discuss the bobcat video that went viral last week and Bobcat Goldthwait’s suspicious silence on the matter. Plus, scientists unveil the whitest paint ever created, and Luke relives one of the worst days in personal watercraft history.

  • #3403 The Balding Bassassin

    Apr 16 2021

    Luke and Andrew play a game intended to put people to sleep. 

  • #3402 The Ginger Assassin And The Dreaded Devil’s Teeth

    Apr 15 2021

    A mysterious tweet has some Game of Thrones fans hoping that a Season 8 “redo” is on the way. Plus, today’s Drops of St2pider flashbacks send Luke and Andrew on a nostalgic journey. And some Tens with very good memories create a very special installment of TBTL Blursdays!

  • #3401 Paulie Walshnuts

    Apr 14 2021

    Andrew offers a public apology for some less-than-flattering things he said about a cool young man on yesterday’s show. Plus, Luke is tempted to adopt a Chihuahua from hell that is looking for a new home. And they pay tribute to the erstwhile ArcLight Cinema in Hollywood, which was a special place for them both.

  • #3400 The Ambien Awards

    Apr 13 2021

    Luke is disappointed to learn that TBTL has once again been overlooked by a prestigious podcast award, but Andrew offers a silver lining. Also, will we all be wearing robotic exoskeletons in 5 years? Let’s hope so.

  • #3399 Fifteen Ways To Find Out If He’s The Right Podcast For You!

    Apr 12 2021

    Luke and Andrew say goodbye to a good friend who IS NOT DYING but taking an exciting new path in life. Plus, today’s installment of Drops of St2pider will leave you petrified and hungry.

  • #3398 It’s My Funny And I Want It Now!

    Apr 09 2021

    Luke and Andrew discover that Lil Nas X’s satanic sneakers may be losing value while Nike tries to recall them? They suspect J.G. Wentworth might have something to do with it.  DROPS OF ST2PIDER: MATCHUP #3 Blue Angels vs Looking for Pokémon VOTE FOR YOUR PICK HERE

  • #3397 Hellman’s Is Other People

    Apr 08 2021

    Andrew fills-in Luke about his big Vaccination Day activities, and Luke is in love with a special moment during a Met’s broadcast. Plus, there’s a ketchup emergency in the U.S., and the TBTL Drops of Stupider contest continues with matchup #2 (vote below!) DROPS OF ST2PIDER: MATCHUP #2 TBTL Prince tribute vs Sploooch The Diarrhea Turtle VOTE FOR YOUR PICK HERE!

  • #3396 Spalding Pink

    Apr 07 2021

    Luke is reeaaally leaning into his inner 11 year-old, and it’s not a problem at all, thank you very much. Plus, he and Andrew kick off this year’s Drops of St2pider contest for listeners to vote on their favorite TBTL moments of all time. (Link for voting is below!) DROPS OF ST2PIDER: ROUND ONE Today’s matchup pits the TBTL Cereal show up against the live Minnesota State Fair episode. VOTE FOR YOUR PICK HERE!

  • #3395 The Right Way To Remember The Wrong Kind Of Night

    Apr 06 2021

    Chet Haze’s attempts to create a “White Boy Summer” are...problematic. Plus, a weird SNL skit gives Andrew the giggles, and listeners call-in with stories of people cutting in front of them in line (and how they handled it.)

  • #3394 TBTL: Shirts And Skins

    Apr 05 2021

    Luke and Andrew finally address an awkward moment in their friendship that they’d never discussed before. They also take a moment to remember how funny It’s Always Sunny In Philadelphia is while discussing their body image issues.

  • #3393 The Coach Of First Class

    Apr 02 2021

    Luke and Andrew try to recover after losing their minds over a baseball game last night. Plus, Nike is trying to recall Lil Nas X’s “satan shoes” from the 665 people who alright bought them. 

  • #3392 Die Hard 3: Jingle All The Way

    Apr 01 2021

    Andrew finds his old PDA from 2004 and powers it up to find some old notes he wrote for himself. He and Luke and are also happy to hear that Volkswagen is now being investigated by the SEC for lying about changing its name to “Voltswagen.” 

  • #3391 When Venus Is In The 7th House Of Neptune...

    Mar 31 2021

    Luke and Andrew learn that Volkswagen was, indeed, lying about changing its name, and now they are going back to never believing anything ever again. Also, Luke’s trip to the Apple store gave him some real Red Dawn vibes. 

  • #3390 The Petty Man’s Burden

    Mar 30 2021

    Luke and Andrew test out a new recording device that either allows them or forces them to look at each other during the show, depending on whom you ask. Plus, Volkswagen finally admits that Luke was right all along and agrees to change its name to “Voltswagen.”

  • #3389 A Man, A Palm Pilot, A Canal!

    Mar 29 2021

    Luke discovers a British betting site where people were wagering on the Suez Canal situation...and a lot of other fascinating stuff. Plus, according to some recent TikToks, Papa John is not doing super great?

  • #3388 I Don’t Understand This Podcast, And I Won’t Respond To It

    Mar 26 2021

    Luke spent yesterday in an abandoned mining town and has come back with a bunch of stories that make Andrew have to use the restroom. They also pay tribute to the absolute comic genius of Jessica Walter.

  • #3387 Dan Pashman’s Media Blintz

    Mar 25 2021

    Longtime TBTL Friendo Dan Pashman of The Sporkful swings by to talk about what it’s like to invent a brand-new pasta from the ground-up (and to answer the most important question of our time: Is Thousand Island really a condiment?) 

  • #3386 Rational Exuberance

    Mar 24 2021

    Luke and Andrew find out some truly Dazzling Deets about polar bears, penguin pee, and diamonds raining down on Jupiter. Plus, the General Mills PR department could really learn something from the folks over at Post cereals.

  • #3385 Real Children, Stihl Children

    Mar 23 2021

    Luke wonders if he and Andrew are beginning to spend too much (virtual) time together, and notable not-nice person Bill Shatner tries to buy immortality through an A.I.-type technology. 

  • #3384 I Gotta Feeling That It’s Going To Be A Year Of Magical Thinking

    Mar 22 2021

    Luke takes extreme measures to get out of a Coffee Emergency, while Andrew reminisces about the ubiquitous “Free Coffee” of the olden days. Plus, more details emerge about the different versions of Mrs. Doubtfire that exist somewhere.

  • #3383 Oh, Brother, Where Art Thou Ink?

    Mar 19 2021

    In the most 2021 news ever, the Fleetwood Mac Longboarding Guy is selling his viral video as an NFT...with some caveats. Plus, Luke explores a rumor that an NC-17 version of Mrs. Doubtfire exists, Sean Hannity vapes on air, and cattle rustling is, apparently, still a thing.

  • #3382 I’ve Got People To Meet And Goulash To Eat

    Mar 18 2021

    A listener sets Luke straight on the topic of “gabagool”, which somehow makes Andrew very, very hungry for goulash? Anyway, they also talk about a new docu-series which literally has Luke acting like a 15-year-old again. And Andrew ruins the Blursdays. 

  • #3381 Impossible Gabagool

    Mar 17 2021

    It’s St. Patrick’s day, which marks the anniversary of the day Andrew tried to fight a Minneapolis Uber driver and Luke almost lost his cool at a beloved Polish bar. They also commemorate the 1-year-and-1-day anniversary of the Family Ties movie. And Joe Biden “slaps back” at those criticizing his dog, who nipped a White House employee.

  • #3380 Cash 4 Gold Steak

    Mar 16 2021

    Luke got cyberbullied over a sandwich last night, and a chef in Miami is selling gold-encrusted steaks that his customers do not want.

  • #3379 If It’s Cello, Let It Mellow

    Mar 15 2021

    Luke’s Lyft driver taught him some pretty interesting things about Henry Kissinger’s role in a global plot to reduce the earth’s population. Plus, Yo-Yo Ma gave an impromptu performance at his vaccination clinic, and it turns out Subway is the food of choice on Korean TV.

  • #3378 Shat Happens

    Mar 12 2021

    Journalist and TBTL Friendo Andrea Seabrook joins the show after she got cyberbullied by William Shatner yesterday. Also, Luke explains why several large police officers dragged him out of a Flaming Lips rehearsal last night.

  • #3377 The Ringo Is Strong With This One

    Mar 11 2021

    Luke and Andrew remember the day, exactly one year ago, when they finally realized that the world had really changed (and that their burps would never be as fun.) Plus, Captain Kirk just picked a very strange fight with Luke’s friend at NPR.

  • #3376 Different Sides Of The Same Coyne

    Mar 10 2021

    Luke is excited to meet his musical hero, Wayne Coyne, this afternoon...especially after Andrew tells him a spicy detail about the Flaming Lips frontman. Plus, the return of This Day In TBTL History takes us back 5 years and puts Luke and Andrew on some shaky ground.

  • #3375 Greta Van Feet

    Mar 09 2021

    Luke and Andrew find out who they REALLY are with the help of an enneagram test and their friend Lauren Masterson. Plus, Luke talks about his beautiful feet a lot and it’s very upsetting. 

  • #3374 You May Say I’m A Streamer...

    Mar 08 2021

    Luke has a big DISHWASHER UPDATE. He and Andrew are also ready to talk WandaVision, Mandelorian, and last night’s Meghan Markle interview with Oprah. 

  • #3373 Roombas Get Stoombas

    Mar 05 2021

    Luke brings the HEAT today with a Friday Motivation via the fine Clump Dogs at Defector. Plus, what do you get when you combine music and crypto-currency? A lot of money and a very confused Andrew. 

  • #3372 One Set Of Cleat Prints In The Sand

    Mar 04 2021

    Luke has either discovered something special in the Willamette River, or he’s going off the deep end. Your call. Plus, Dan Harmon introduces a compelling new system for the Zodiac calendar. And Andrew’s getting very nervous about fantasy baseball. 

  • #3371 A Double Pisces

    Mar 03 2021

    Luke and Andrew finally get their big break in sports media, and Luke discovers something mind blowing about the cinnamon toast he ate as a kid. Plus, a company is animating old photos of departed loved ones, and it turns out there’s a reason why ketchup is sometimes called “fancy”.

  • #3370 The 30-Year Punch

    Mar 02 2021

    Luke and Andrew celebrate a very special TBTL-a-versary, even though someone forgot. Plus, listeners chime in with their stories of butter love.

  • #3369 Fine And Tandy

    Mar 01 2021

    Luke and Andrew finally address the imaginary scandal surrounding their imaginary tanning salon in Portland. Plus, last night’s Golden Globes broadcast was pretty cool until it wasn’t, and a surgeon goes to traffic court while surgeoning.

  • #3368 Long Time Elephant, First Time Caller

    Feb 26 2021

    TBTL Friendo Davy Rothbart jumps on the show to talk about his amazing new documentary, 17 Blocks. Plus, Andrew’s acting career takes another step forward with the role he’s been waiting for his entire life.

  • #3367 Socks Aren’t The Way To This Soldier’s Heart!

    Feb 25 2021

    Luke and Andrew watch a bunch of Amy Grant videos and fall in love all over again. Plus, one of Andrew’s favorite electronic stores is closing and taking its spaceships with it. 

  • #3366 Jughead Jonesing

    Feb 24 2021

    Luke introduces Andrew to one the hottest viral songs banging around the internet, and it is delightful. Plus, a young man fakes his own kidnapping to get out of work for a day.

  • #3365 R.O.W.D.T.Y. Rowdy Actors

    Feb 23 2021

    A story about scary robot dogs leads Andrew to admit to one of his weirder internet proclivities. He and Luke also discuss Jim Nabors at great length for some reason. 

  • #3364 Who Watches The Dishwashers?

    Feb 22 2021

    Luke finally gets a breakthrough on his appliance-repair conundrum, but the news comes with more than a bit of irony. Plus, Daft Punk says goodbye in a very Daft Punky way, an old joke from The Simpsons comes back to haunt Ted Cruz, and the results of the Great Condiment Debate are in!

  • #3363 Too Ritz For My Blood

    Feb 19 2021

    Luke and Andrew find themselves on opposite sides of a debate over Thousand Island dressing and how it should be categorized. Plus, the internet delights in catching Ted Cruz doing very Ted Cruzy things, and a heroic mattress salesman in Texas throws his doors open to those who need shelter. 

  • #3362 Not All Heroes Wear Diapers

    Feb 18 2021

    Andrew’s failed attempts to buy a pack of baseball cards may have just changed his life forever, or so he says. Plus, a couple of employees hit the wrong button and accidentally wire $900 million dollars and can’t get it back. How’s your day going? 

  • #3361 Clear Heis, Full Hearts

    Feb 17 2021

    Luke and Andrew welcome a new, possibly non-existent group of listeners into the TBTL family. They also learn that blowing on Nintendo cartridges never really worked, and that Luke’s favorite emoji is branding him as an Old.